my story – Page 4 – The Welcome Home

THM or A Plan On The Shelf

THMbookshelf October 17, 2013 I received my book… and I wrote about the THM journey here with additional entries following. I wasn’t so much seeking to be a trim healthy mama as much as I was determined to be a healthy mama who happened to figure out how to be and remain disciplined and trim.

I had such determination and such confidence. And success, too.
Life happened. And failure.

This morning I’m cleaning up from a few different events in the last several days and all I see around me are large bowls, serving platters, large carafes, stacks of other dishes, paper products… all the aftermath of food. Lots of food. My scale showed me that, too.

In the early days, I was trying to figure out how THM was going to fit in with my life. This bookshelf in my kitchen sort of represents my life. But, I’m telling you, it took no time to figure out that that was the wrong question – the wrong premise on which to embark on the THM journey. I couldn’t even reword that premise to be: how can my lifestyle fit into THM? Though, I did learn to adjust right away, feeble as it was, it wasn’t at all bcz the THM plan fit into anything and not even bcz I fit into the THM plan. It was simple determination to deny self and walk on in faith that I could be free from the grip of undisciplined consumption and THM plan was the path to that freedom.

Somewhere along the way, small compromises deterred me from wholeheartedly walking on that freedom path. Small and then absent minded great compromises dull the sharp resolve of discipline. Somewhere along the way I lost sight of the plan, of my resolve to be self-controlled and resolute regarding food (read: sugar). And nothing cements repeated failure more than repeated lack of determination. I typed and then removed a sentence here — it went something like “…lack of a plan.” But I had a plan. I had a very good plan. And when I stuck to the plan, it worked very, very well. It’s a good plan. But a plan on the shelf is not the same as a plan in the mind, a plan in the hand, and a plan in the will and a plan in action. A plan is worthless when not accompanied by resolute determination to carry it out.

Excuses? Loads. Loads of ’em. Reasons? Many. Many valid reasons if reason excuses failure. And then there’s the worst of all: Compromise. I look at where I am today compared with where I was seven months ago and I reason that where I am is surely not where I was seventeen months ago. I reason, I’ve only gained 5 or 6 pounds in the last seven months… that’s not too bad, really. I mean, considering, I already lost 35 pounds, so only gaining 5 or 6 pounds is not that bad. Not that bad is one the greatest enemies I have. Compromise is an enemy when it’s not used very carefully and in the right situations. Rarely is that the case.

Is the 5 or 6 pound gain the problem or the failure? No. Taking my eyes off the plan (could be any plan by the way — not stuck to the THM-only-no-other-will-do notion) is what’s disconcerting to me. Failing to be, and remain, determined is what I mean.

I want to be, to become, and to remain: Determined. I don’t want my plans to be on the shelf…

The irony of this thought was not lost on me this morning as I was reading my Bible — reflecting on the content and cross references. I thought, why do I ever get away from doing this? Why is this hunger for the Word so diminished sometimes? So prone to wander… Why are these precious insights so dimmed on one day and not another. Determination.

So many areas of our lives are so inextricably linked. Isn’t the Lord so merciful to let us see these connections, fall and get up, by His grace, taking His hand? Isn’t it gracious of Him to bring to remembrance different parables to keep our eyes on Truth?

The Current Truth

Oct05springhetti

I began working on my new This Beautiful Life journal/planner/notebook, and once again I’m stymied by my answers. I see the designated spaces for specific answers and am reticent to write mine down.

My tendency is to be very tentative about what goals I write (thinking if I write it, I’ll be committed to doing it). One day I might only write a few goals — another day I might write down things that would take two lifetimes to accomplish. My abstract sequential / concrete random thinking style seems to prevent me from ever making a definitive list. Have you ever analyzed your thinking style? There are different tests you can take to determine your thinking style — and I’m sincerely not so sure it’s crucial to do it, know what it is, or whatever, but this might help you understand yourself (and particularly your children — and your husband) better, and help you get why you (or they) do things the way you (or they) do them. Just an idea for you.

So, back to my “priority journal” [Chloe’s: This Beautiful Life] and that box: The Current Truth. That box shows up on five pages. There are five sections corresponding to five priorities. It’s hard for me to narrow down five priorities. Would that be hard for you? So, I’m thinking about my priorities: what are they? Why are they important (or, important enough to be in the top five)? As I think on these things, I have to realize that my priorities and the things I prioritize —by how I spend my time— are not the same thing. That’s where that The Current Truth reality box is staring me in the face like a mirror. And I have to say: wow, my current reality is not where I want to be. And, if my current truth or current reality is not what I want it to be, what I’m doing each day is actually pulling me away from, or destroying, what I want or where I want to be. Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands. –proverbs 14.1 What I’m doing or how I’m spending my time or money or whatever is quite revealing as to how serious I am about accomplishing my priorities.

You know, there’s another way to get a pretty clear picture of priorities… might be too hard to hear, but ask your husband what he thinks the current truth is regarding a particular priority you have. Or, maybe you have a son or daughter who could give you invaluable feedback. Maybe a trusted friend. Maybe all you need is a pen and paper. Write down your priorities — what they look like at their best and what’s the current truth? Better yet, get Chloe’s book. Honestly, you’ll be so surprised at how life changing, complex and invaluable this simple little book will turn out to be in your life.

So today I’m sitting here, writing things down, looking out over the yard… and, honestly, the way looks stormy and the road looks long. I don’t want to write anything else down and I don’t want to do what I must. I don’t want to commit to anything bcz I so often fail and I’m pretty uncertain about a lot of things – things over which I have little control. And, I don’t want to have another list of stuff I didn’t get to or didn’t do. I relate to the apostle Paul and think of what he says in Romans 7: “…For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not. For the good that I would I do not…” — 7.18-19

But if I don’t press on… well, I sure don’t like where that would leave me — that, and I know I don’t want to be that girl. So… I press on. That’s my current truth. And, it’s because of the Truth that I will do this. I will seek Him and I will trust Him. That, and I truly do want this to be a beautiful life.

For it is God which worketh in you
both to will and to do of His good pleasure.”
philippians 2.13

What if You knew You were Dying?

AChristianHomeLogo10 Have you ever asked yourself what you’d do if you knew you were dying? Or, how would you live differently if you knew this year was your last year to live?
I was talking with my friend on the phone this morning and as I was recounting different ongoing family situations, I related that even though we had a real “wake-up call” last summer, we haven’t changed things we do or don’t do all that much. As I hung up the phone, it occurred to me that I must not take, or respond to, wake up calls all that seriously. I was disappointed with the reality of my inaction.

A few times a week I receive blog entries written by or about a woman who is graciously dying. I know, right?!? Graciously dying. She knows she’s dying — known it for quite awhile — wrote and published a book that she thought perhaps she’d never see in print, and yet, it has been circulating for a year or more, now. She’s battled cancer and, by her own admission, has sought to live well to the end. This is a relatively new way of describing living: living well. loving well. dying well. caring well for others. being loved well. You get the picture: well. Doing things well. I’m often put off by new lingo–but it reaches me eventually and sometimes even worms its way into my speech. Kinda like the, I know, right?!?! I frequently exclaim. Or, the use of the word, totally. I totally use that word.

Well, back to the wake up call. You know, when my husband had a heart attack this past summer – or three attacks, to be more realistic — it was hard to fathom the grave nature of what had happened. And I’m not sure if it’s his personality, his activity level or my own ignorance, but it’s like, Okay, so that happened, and we’ve moved on. Kinda like we moved on in 2007 when he had his first heart attack. But when I read about another woman dealing with a similar scenario, I’m moved with compassion and want to offer her comfort and encouragement; I pray for her and all that’s happening to her and what she’ll face in the midst of the trial: her wake up call. But mine? I don’t know why it doesn’t yet strike me the same way.

Well, as I talked with my friend, I realized I haven’t dared to just look at things for what they are and realize I need to take them more seriously. I’m not meaning I need to fall apart, cry it out or whatever, I mean that I need to recognize that real life’s happening and it is going to end. We are all, in fact, dying. At one rate or another, we’re all facing death. I wonder how quickly I’d make changes were I to be in Kara’s place – Kara of The Hardest Peace, Kara of Mundane Faithfulness – that Kara.

I keep reading Kara… and every day I learn something new about life, the Lord, peace and love. And as I work through my prayer/priority/goal-setting/evaluation Journal, This Beautiful Life, I learn more about what He has for me and what I ought to/might do about it all. I’ve decided to add to my thoughts as I’m writing in each section, the thought: would I value this more (or less) if I knew I was dying?

Because, I really am. I just have no idea when… and I want to live today in light of that fact.

The recovery road

wesandmeinhospitalbeforesurgery All the information, booklets, visits from the different therapists and the remarks of different doctors in the days and hours prior to leaving the hospital following my husband’s open heart bypass surgery didn’t prepare me for the recovery road. Yes, I’d listened intently. Yes, I’d taken notes and appeared to comprehend all the information they were giving me — giving us.

I guess I was prepared for what they’d specifically instructed me to do when we returned home, but I wasn’t prepared for the other stuff — the other stuff that they didn’t tell me. And now, looking back, I see that there was “other stuff” they couldn’t tell me –– they couldn’t prepare me for what I’d experience any more than the obstetrician could prepare me for what I’d experience in labour and delivery and for the weeks following the birth of our first child. I marvel at the similarities.

Last July, we were sitting out on the deck of a local restaurant enjoying the airplanes, hotair balloons and the beautiful sunset. In ordering the bacon wrapped tenderloin, I obviously completely forgot that my. husband. had. just. had. open. heart. surgery. We’d walked there so that we could keep with the prescribed daily walking schedule — two to three walks per day, increasing the length of the walks each day. But, yes, I shot us both in the foot with that order.

Through the month of July when our first son was born 35 years ago, each day was filled with the activities of feeding, bathing, napping, dressing, strolls, and extended times of just gazing at him while he slept. I’d gently lay my head near my son’s face to hear his breathing or my hand on his back to feel the gentle rise and fall of each respiration. Each day seemed so long but the weeks seemed to fly by — such an uncanny parallel to the way this past July was spent.

Each day we’d wake up early, the sun streaming in our living room — my husband in his recliner, and I beside him on my temporary bed. The new electric recliner gave him so much freedom to get up or sit by himself, but the tone of the electronic lift was like an alarm clock — the operative word being: alarm. 😉 Though he never complained of my incessant, day or night, staring and asking, are you okay? I stared at him while he rested, stared at him while he ate, stared at him while he read. Each day seemed long — much like those early newborn days, a flurry of firsts, busy days just like the early days of the first baby, my days were filled with feeding, bathing, napping, dressing, strolls and staring at my… husband. Somehow the busyness of keeping each day’s chart filled in — assorted new meds, his temperature, blood pressure, walks, water, meals and doctor visits all served as distractions to what was really going on or what had really gone on.

I wasn’t prepared for the new tentative feel to life. I wasn’t prepared for the feeling that this was all very temporary — that at any time my husband would have another heart attack and we’d do all that all over again. I wasn’t prepared for what felt like the loss of the middle years — suddenly catapulted to the later years — the last years. I didn’t anticipate that there’s be potholes on the recovery road and surely didn’t anticipate their source. I wasn’t prepared for the comments and questions I’d receive and, therefore, didn’t have a ready response. Instead of hearing them as simple conversation, I heard them as attacks and didn’t have the wherewithal to give reasoned answers. I took my husband’s health personally and have felt ashamed that I contributed to it being what it is — that I could have/should have made better choices for the last thirty six years and, had I done so, he’d not be in the condition he is.

In saner, stronger, more rational moments I’ve been able to reason that, first, God is sovereign. That’s a sure plank on which to stand. He’s also Lord of my life, Lord of my husband’s life and has been our sustainer, provider, strength, and guide through all these years. I’ve been careful to be in the Word and in prayer daily and to recognize, ultimately, where the feeling of attack came/comes from. The devil knows my weaknesses and one of them is guilt or shame over things that happen around me — that when bad things happen, it must be my fault; when relationships are strained, it must be my fault; if/when my kids fail, reject me, reject the Lord, or whatever: it must be my fault. So also, when my husband’s health failed, surely it must be my fault and to excuse myself in any way would mean I’m not accepting the fact. It’s a vicious cycle — one I’m very familiar with — one that I must work diligently to accurately see for what it is.

It’s a decision I’m not always quick to react with though, and sometimes I’m in the middle of a pothole when I finally see I’ve fallen into the trap the devil’s set for me on the road. And in that place, I must resolve to yield to the Lord: I resolve to rest in His promises. I used to see as weakness what I now see as yieldedness. I used to see as a copout what I now see as trust. What I used to see as naïve I now see as faith. I often wish it hadn’t taken me so long to see these truths.

No one sets out to have heart disease — but I wish I’d grasped early on what it is to set out to NOT have heart disease. Obviously, I don’t even yet grasp this.

Looking ahead, looking back

teacuppamela I glanced down at the clock as I pulled into the parking garage. I rounded the corner and pulled into the same space I’d vacated just 7 hours earlier. Knowing the segment queue was on the :20’s, quickly clicking through the radio stations, I was hoping to hear one of the morning “phone taps” my girls had replayed for me a couple of times. These “phone taps” are pranks a radio host makes on unsuspecting individuals. Twisted, I know. But, given the situation I’d been experiencing, lots of my thoughts were scrambled in those days. Precious minutes were ticking by as I waited in my car at the hospital for the call to be aired. I waited, thinking the radio dj would play just one song – but no, he would play two. Since I don’t listen to the music on that station, I found the first song so annoying. But no matter, I was waiting for the phone tap. Then a song came on that I’d heard once before (yes, I’m really late to the game on pop songs) but I didn’t know the words — except: I’m happy… happy… happy.

It was the morning after Wes’s open heart surgery and stretched emotions and fatigue had begun to catch up with me—but as He did each day, the Lord gave me strength for every hour. I’m so grateful for what I learned of Him in those days.

O, and that phone tap was a dumb — as most are. But the happy song swirled through my mind that day—and because of the great goodness of the Lord, I truly did (and do) feel like a room without a roof!

And, as I look back over the past year and begin a new one, I want to clap along bcz I know what happiness means to me and I want to live my life dancing before the Lord “like a room without a roof” echoing: happy, happy, happy! The Lord is gracious!

The Simple Soap

teacuppamela You’re going to love this soap! When you try your first bar, you’re going to notice an immediate difference between TheSimpleSoap and “commercial” soap company soap. That’s why I’ve been so excited about The Simple Soap giveaway! So… later today I will be selecting a recipient of TheSimpleSoap triple bar soap giveaway!

So… for several more hours, you have an opportunity to have your name added to the bowl of names in the drawing. The only thing I’m asking is that you’ll share one thing you’re aiming to do or achieve or stop doing in this new year. The comments we’ve received thus far have been wonderfully encouraging! Go ahead and share your thoughts! I’ll add your name to the bowl and later today will have the drawing!

Thank you for reading… and for those of you who’ve been faithful readers of The Welcome Home blog, may I say, Thank you for your support and encouragement–I appreciate each of you. I’ve made the decision to begin regularly blogging again and am seeking the LORD how this blog can be a more encouraging and integral part of people’s lives. So, to that end, may this be a fruitful new year!

update! update! I wrote all the names here and on Facebook and had my daughter-in-love select one of the slips out of the pile and… THE WINNER IS: SARA R
Thank you all for sharing in this with me and for participating in TheSimpleSoap giveaway drawing. I’ll be sending the box of three soaps to Sara… many blessings and love to you, Sara — Happy New Year — from me and The Simple Soap!

Blue & White

teacuppamela I love blue and white things. Blue is my favourite colour. It’s not my favourite mood, though I struggle with that one. Sometimes, a lot. Blue is my favourite for hydrangeas, dishes, gemstones, berries, skies and seas. And though I mostly prefer to wear pink and black now, navy clothing has long been pretty much the only colour I’ve worn.

So you can imagine, that when I went to my first Basic seminar (wearing my favourite colour and that favourite colour was the colour of my dress), I felt right at home that night. I hadn’t learned yet that how things feel and seem in a situation are both critically important to me—and bcz of this, I, early on, was taken in by all the new information, all the new approach to life. All the blue and white.

A few years later I would be sitting in a Mother’s Meeting in Tennessee and I would hear a phrase that would come to have incredible significance to me. One of the mothers commented to another: Well, you don’t have to be so blue and white about it! I let that sink down in my ears. Tucked it away for some future day… and when that day came, I understood. I totally understood.

I was not raised “in a christian home” and did not have the background or the foundation of faith that I have today. I was growing in the Lord and was eager to do the right thing to live right, to do the right works, to not make mistakes, to have bright and cheerful, obedient children, to not suffer shipwreck. And on and on. So… the blue and white! There was so much blue and white (remember, I’m not talking colour here)!

All the stuff I didn’t agree with or that didn’t set well with me or things I didn’t/couldn’t grasp, began to pile up—but instead (in the early days) of discarding or walking away from those things, I kept thinking I would/should/could try harder. The blue and white appeal was so alluring, so compelling—I felt I must strive to do/think/be better. I thought if I worked harder, I could get it… I could finally get to a successful, faithful Christian life. That was a lie. It would, in time, become clear to me.

The trouble with cleverly orchestrated, tightly controlled information, firmly established methods and the appearance of righteousness is that somewhere along the way, that original, sincere desire to know and serve the Lord God, to understand His Word and to observe it and to walk in His ways, to give Him honour and glory, to live in faith by the grace of God, to know and love the Lord Jesus and to obey Him… well, all that gets set aside or gets redefined by following all the rules instituted by a man instead of simply seeking to know and do the will of God by daily seeking Him in the Word and in prayer and following the Lord Jesus Christ in the light of the Holy Spirit.

As I’ve written in some previous posts, it’s been a long time since I(we) sat in one of those Basic or Advanced seminars. It’s been a long time since we’ve read anything the Institute publishes and a long time since we began to question and throw off the shackles of IBLP / ATI. But, like an onion… or any engrained erroneous teaching or any engrained bad habit or patterns of thinking, there are layers and layers and layers that need to be peeled away, cut back and removed in order for the truth to have preeminence.

With each passing year… I see yet another thought or principle that is incorrect or is a false teaching that I’ve believed and I’ve had to stop, see the error for what it is and repent of the practice of the teaching/idea/etc. Freedom comes from each exercise of faith, each revelation of Truth.

What I thought was freedom was really a cage… what I thought was a solid foundation of truth was really a slippery slope and the new approach to life was really an intricate web of false teaching. You gotta understand, it all seemed so good… life seemed so much better when it was all blue and white… I thought we were doing all the right and best things for our home and family. We were so sincerely seeking to know and do the will of God and thought that the careful constructs of the Institute were the ones to follow.

A battle I’ve had to fight through the ensuing years has been the battle of what if’s. What if we hadn’t been in ATI? Or what if we’d never followed the principles of the Institute? What if we’d not been so legalistic or so rigid in our parenting? What if we hadn’t been so blue and white? Would we have been able to escape some of the problems we’ve experienced? Would we have been able to avoid some heartaches? I don’t know. I don’t know the answers to the what if’s. But I do know this: God is and has been faithful to us. And I trust His word. And what the devil intended for evil, God intends for good and so… the what if’s? Eternity will sort them out. I cannot.

So the last 16 or 17 years have been sort of a free-fall *into* the everlasting, strong Hands of the Lord. We’ve clearly seen God’s tender mercies and work in our lives: we’ve been weaker and we’ve been stronger… we’ve been more sure and more doubtful of different Christian beliefs/practices… we’ve made a bunch of blunders and have had a bunch of good things happen… but most of all, we’ve come to the place of looking to Jesus, the Author and Finisher of our faith, by the mercy of God, seeking to live daily following Him and Him alone and by the grace of God we seek to finish well.

three months = thm

teacuppamela A little over three months ago, I ordered the Trim Healthy Mama book. I kept ‘stumbling’ into links and recipes during searches for health, no sugar and a few other search words I used each day googling for ‘healthy’ foods — or foods with no sugar. I would read recipes that women had adapted or linked from the THM book and I’d think: I could NEVER do this… well, at least not for long. And given the fact that I only ~~know~~ knew how to crash diet, I thought it would be pretty hard thing to justify spending $35. on a book. The only books I’ve bought in recent years that cost near that much were a couple of CAKE books! So, yeah, I ~~have~~ had my priorities. But a few days went by and I kept mulling over the thought that it just might be a good idea… I even thought that the price alone might force me to behave and follow the diet—even though I really didn’t have any idea what the plan really entailed. Then there was the thought that I surely wouldn’t do a vegan diet or an all raw diet… no, I had not been there done that… I just never wanted to be there doing that, that’s all. And then there was my beloved every morning cuppa tea with milk & honey. And then there was my every morning café mocha. Or two. And then there was my every single evening cuppa tea with milk & honey. And then, of course, there were all those other beloved carbie foods. The food of my people.

But I wasn’t feeling well. Health problems were driving me to do something… anything… but something different than what I was doing.

So I bought the book. I know… I know… I should have consulted my husband and should’ve talked it over. When the book arrived, I did talk it over with him. Now three months later, you know what I wish? I wish I’d explored it sooner—I wish I’d bought it sooner. But I didn’t.

Looking back on that day — the day I was standing at my butcher block table next to the bookshelf in my kitchen — having just come in from the porch where my UPS man had brought me my package, I was excitedly opening up the cardboard packaging. I pulled out that enormous book—held it up—and at the time, I didn’t realize I was holding up the book against the backdrop of that bookshelf filled with every kind of not-so-trim-healthy-mama book there is!! I set the book down on the shelf and laughed… and wondered, where does this book fit in with my life? It didn’t fit in… and that’s why I was where I was that day.

THMbookshelf

Well, sat down and I began to read… and read… and read… and that day, wobbly as they were, I took my first steps on the THM journey…

THM… Seriously.

teacuppamela You know what? I like the Trim Healthy Mama (diet) plan. Seriously. I like it enough to think I’ll always like this plan. Seriously. And the reason I keep saying, seriously, is because I believe this plan can only be a benefit if it’s taken seriously. I can, at this early stage of the plan see the importance of seriousness. And I can also easily see that if you fail to plan, you plan to fail on this plan. I finally see the reason for and the wisdom behind the size and weight and cost of this book and the length of time it took Pearl and Serene to write it. It’s meant to be taken seriously. Seriously, the plan is meant to be followed: seriously.

I’m guessing that this all might sound like I’m just playing around in order to see how many times and ways I might use the word, seriously. Trust me, I’m not. I guess I really and truly want to communicate that it’s not a plan to be dabbled with or that it’s not a plan to be taken lightly and it’s not a plan to be undertaken without serious preparation. There’s so much more to the book and plan than simply eating foods in correct combinations… more to it than “dieting” or eating lower carbs… more to it than eliminating sugar or honey or white flour or potatoes or corn or whatever other high-glycemic index food you might think of.

Our local variety store annually sets up a huge school supplies section and taped to the shelves that are loaded with every kind of pen, pencil, paper, notebook, eraser, etc., etc., that you might think of are lists provided by local school teachers for what is expected for each student to purchase and bring with them to school each new school year. The teachers are planners and they are serious about preparing students in advance with what will be expected of them. This thought has come to me a number of times as I’ve come across yet another thing I don’t yet have in my Trim Healthy Kitchen. I have a running supply list of food items I’m slowly acquiring. And while I initially did have many of the necessary foods to follow the plan — I did not have a lot of ingredients to follow the plan successfully or seriously. With each passing day I’m discovering more and more the investment of time and the depth of planning that went into this book and why it’s referred to a plan and not a diet. Seriously.

So, this is my in advance encouragement if you’re planning to buy the Trim Healthy Mama book or if you think you’ll make it fine without spending the $35. to buy the book or if you think you’ll wing it with ingredients you have on hand in your pantry or fridge. Sincerely, you won’t be able to work the plan if you don’t study it and if you’re not prepared. Seriously.

If you really wanna be a THM… it’s going to cost you and you’re going to have to take it seriously. It practically goes without saying: I know, for me, healthwise, not planning was costing me a whole lot more than this new planning. Seriously.

[Tip: Trim Healthy Mama Facebook]

THM… so much hope

teacuppamela As I press on, on the THM (Trim Healthy Mama) journey, I have so much hope. I have so much hope bcz I’m so not alone and I’m so not seeing this as a diet but a different way of approaching health and nutrition. I say this bcz I’ve experienced so many diets in the past. And the difference, for me, with Trim Healthy Mama (after this, THM), is that it’s not a limited time diet. By this I mean, it’s not the lemonade-type diet or the military-type diet or the mama with a wayward child/depression diet or the zone-type diet or name another type of diet that’s generally undertaken for a limited period of time and eventually the old way of eating returns. And so do the pounds.

Now, why did I say I’m so not alone in this? Easy… thousands of other women are implementing the THM plan in their own lives and homes and numerous websites, Facebook groups and Pinterest pins are dedicated to THM. Women all over are sharing their successes, before and after’s, struggles, plans, recipes, suggestions and enthusiastic encouragement with relative strangers–but not strangers really, who’re traveling the same journey. Shared experiences give hope… shared understanding gives hope… all this gives women the motivation to press on. All this, and more, keeps me pressing on.

I’d hazard to guess that for a lot of women who seriously undertake the THM plan, there comes some sort of a day of reckoning, a day or time where they recognize that food and excess weight and out of control eating is symptomatic of deeper issues—things the Lord intends bring to the light and to help deal with—and what originally interested them in doing a new thing to lose weight, a different diet or whatever is not what keeps them on plan. What keeps them (and now, me) on plan is the daily journey to health and yielding to the Lord the area of food and its stronghold–or previous stronghold.

I’m finding incredible freedom in not eating everything I want — freedom in recognizing that food had a stronghold on me and day by day I’m seeing this stronghold’s grip diminishing. The Lord’s addressing some areas that don’t seem to have anything to do with food–but yet food’s been the outward stronghold. See, here’s an example… I so often ~~don’t~~ didn’t want to “diet” bcz I love, love, love café mochas. Love em. ~~Drink~~ drank ’em every morning. Yes, plural. Yes, every morning. Hot milk, two pumps of chocolate and a long shot of coffee. Drink, rinse, repeat. Didn’t want to give ’em up—–couldn’t give ’em up—-wouldn’t give ’em up. But I began to recognize that my delights were harming me–too much sugar was causing problems and I knew I needed to make some changes. I was loving the sugar but it wasn’t loving me back. And isn’t that how sin is? We give in and it mockingly smacks us on the backside.

Looking back, I really think I thought I’d make some changes and get on track and then be able to go back to the same ol’ same ol’ ways (especially since I’ve done this soooo many times). That was foolishness–and I know it. I really know it now. Greater than all that, I now also know that the Lord was putting His finger on some deeper matters, using all of this to help me be willing to deal with other non-food related issues. It is His mercy and lovingkindness to bring us to these places of correction and brokenness in our walk with Him. It is for freedom He set us free. I’d lost sight of that somewhere along the way.

Interestingly, what eventually brought me to THM began with that search for health remedies. Still struggling with some ongoing health issues, still searching for solutions, I began to see frequent connections with the Trim Healthy Mama book. Some of my Google searches for low/no sugar or low glycemic index recipes took me to a few blogs/sites I thoroughly enjoy today — I didn’t initially see the THM connection! Sadly, over the last year because of family busyness and other things, I hadn’t been tracking along with the Above Rubies site nor the progress of the writing of the THM book—though I’d seen copies of it here and there, recently. Additionally, I regret I hadn’t been in close touch with local friends who where already working the THM plan, else I might’ve had some questions answered earlier and I might’ve had some health issues addressed earlier, too. But I have to continually affirm: I’m pressing on; no worries, I’m simply glad for the opportunity to have this book in hand now and I’m pressing on (with thousands of other women! ~smile~). I have so much hope… and I’m pressing on.