March 2007 – The Welcome Home

Kathryn’s Letters and another birthday

What a blessing it has been to be able to occasionally talk with Kathryn on the phone and also to receive her letters from Jinja, Uganda where she’s working in an orphanage. I know as she wraps up the month of March there, she’s likely thinking that the time is moving too swiftly!

Her letters have been such a source of encouragement to us and have really been informative as to the nature of her work there and all that’s going on.

I’m missing her very much today as we’ve just returned from celebrating my birthday with most all our children and grand-dears, too. I looked around the room… all the children seated at the table and it was a bittersweet thing to be missing two of them. I smiled as I pictured the days ahead and considered that perhaps for the next birthday there would be more or fewer at the table. One thing I know and it is this: all God’s ways are good and all His paths are peace. I trust Him for that and rest in His grace and merciful kindness.

One of the sweetest things I received for my birthday was a bouquet of tulips from Naomi… I love that she was so enthusiastic to ask daddy to drive her to the store so she could buy a card and the tulips, and chocolates! She doesn’t know about the umpteenth and one diet. :o) and perhaps I send to many mixed messages… one day *no* bad food. The next day some bad food and maybe a mocha, the next day no bad food… and on and on and on.

But now… my birthday has passed and I am older and wiser and perhaps I learned something this birthday… I was reflecting on how the LORD has blessed through the years and I determined to not miss another day by fretting over what wasn’t done well enough and instead, to just be glad. Glad… that’s what I want the year ahead to be… a glad year.

Here’s a link for Kathryn’s Letters

a sad note

The Maxwell’s baby, Susannah Joy, has passed from this life………….. and we pray into the arms of the LORD.
Our deep sympathy to the Maxwell family, especially to Nathan and Melanie… sweet parents… grieving the loss of their newborn – their firstborn child. Please remember them in your prayers as they walk through the days ahead. Sweet comfort is that they are trusting in the merciful grace of the LORD.

Humbling

My name is Pride. I am a cheater.

I cheat you of your God-given destiny… because you demand your own way.
I cheat you of contentment… because you “deserve better than this.”
I cheat you of knowledge… because you already know it all.
I cheat you of healing… because you’re too full of me to forgive.
I cheat you of holiness… because you refuse to admit when you’re wrong.
I cheat you of vision… because you’d rather look in the mirror than out a window.
I cheat you of genuine friendship… because nobody’s going to know the real you.
I cheat you of love…because real romance demands sacrifice.
I cheat you of greatness in heaven…
because you refuse to wash another’s feet on earth.
I cheat you of God’s glory… because I convince you to seek your own.
My name is Pride. I am a cheater.
You like me because you think I’m always looking out for you. Untrue.
God has so much for you, I admit.
But don’t worry…
If you stick with me, you’ll never know.

-from Beth Moore’s Praying God’s Word

a battle of wills

I was standing in the kitchen a little while ago and, as I do most every morning, I was waiting for my tea water to boil. Instantly, Doubter came in along with his friends, Sabotager and Shame to visit She-who-must-be-obeyed. You see, She-who-must-be-obeyed has been battling against My-will-to-obey and She-who-must-be-obeyed is very very cunning and has a litany of excuses as to why she deserves whatever she wants… especially when she listens to friends, Doubter, Sabotager and Shame. They’re all bent on tempting her to listen and bent on destroying My-will-to-obey.

You see, My-will-to-obey is often weak and even seems to exchange places with She-who-must-be-obeyed when My-will-to-obey is not drinking from the fresh life-spring of the Word of God. When My-will-to-obey just meanders through the morning, very quickly My-will-to-obey exchanges the sweet fruit of the spirit for the carnage of the world and begins to linger on with She-who-must-be-obeyed. One of the ways Doubter influences this is to tell his friends Sabotager and Shame to remind My-will-to-obey that it’s never going to get better or that things will never improve or that the day is bleak and so probably, since things will never change, it won’t matter if the bag of cookies is consumed. For, if little or no weight-loss has been achieved, what’s the point in My-will-to-obey continuing working at healthful eating and learning to exercise?

And then it dawns on me (as if for the first time, but for the umpteenth time) …every day’s a battle—O, it’s not about cookies or whatever other weapon the enemy uses to sabotage our flesh- but every day’s a battle of the will to obey God or self. For in each of us is this “She-who-must-be-obeyed” self… and yet, when we put our trust in the LORD Jesus Christ, we have the indwelling of the Holy Spirit and by the Spirit we yield not to self but to God. I find in the LORD all I need and whatever self or the world offers or demands is by comparison: nothing. I, therefore, must be renewed daily in the spirit of my mind that I do not that which “She-who-must-be-obeyed” would do but rather that which is pleasing to the LORD—that which is led of the LORD— who is my all in all… my-will-to-obey.

Excerpts of Romans 7.6-25

But now we are delivered from the law, that being dead wherein we were held; that we should serve in newness of spirit, and not in the oldness of the letter. What shall we say then? Is the law sin? God forbid. Nay, I had not known sin, but by the law: for I had not known lust, except the law had said, Thou shalt not covet.

But sin, taking occasion by the commandment, wrought in me all manner of concupiscence. For without the law sin was dead. For I was alive without the law once: but when the commandment came, sin revived, and I died. And the commandment, which was ordained to life, I found to be unto death.

For we know that the law is spiritual: but I am carnal, sold under sin. For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I. If then I do that which I would not, I consent unto the law that it is good. Now then it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me.

For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not. For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do. Now if I do that I would not, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me. For I delight in the law of God after the inward man:

But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death? I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin.”

I did not eat the cookies Doubter offered to She-who-must-be-obeyed.

prayers…

Please join in prayer for the Maxwell family:
Nathan and Melanie’s newborn daughter Susannah Joy is in NICU…
More here: the Maxwell family blog

home’s cool

I needed to write an article for the next issue of Making It Home magazine. And I thought what shall I write? It’s the May/June issue and I wanted to write something appropriate – meaningful for mothers. And then I thought on the retreat I’ve just attended and the thoughts still swirling around in my mind. I thought on some of the questions also that I’ve received lately and was amazed (but never surprised!) at God’s weaving of different messages and themes.

I’m often asked and often contemplate the question: Why home school? I’m asked, “Do you think everyone should homeschool?” I usually hear that translated: “I don’t homeschool, and you probably think I’m __________ (fill in the blank; bad, wrong, etc.) for not homeschooling.” I get that kind of question/statement regarding a myriad of other topics… motherhood, no birth control, homemaking, submission to one’s husband, church, modest clothing and on and on. People tend to feel judged by those who are “different” than they—especially when it comes to these particular topics.

I’m often asked if I think homeschooling provides the best education for children. To which I reply, homeschooling doesn’t really provide ANY education for children—parents do—I know, a little glib there. I do think that parents need to do or undo what the government schooling does or doesn’t do to and for children – but the mere fact that children are at home and out of the government school atmosphere isn’t the only reason we school at home. There are many schools, I’m told, that are excellent for the care, guidance and education of children. I imagine that’s true and, in fact, I’ve met numerous believers who were government school educated and their lives are dedicated to following the LORD. But almost across the board there’s this underlying currant of thought — it’s subtle in some cases, but it’s there. It’s something that believers the world over just gloss over and don’t even really realize it and it is the educating of men and women to be equal in all ways. It’s the conditioning that boys and girls receive year after year and like the analogy of the frog placed in a pot of cool water and over time the water is heated to boiling and the frog is slowly cooked to death, the identities and distinctions of boys and girls are slowly steeped in the pot, and over time, like the frog, the distinctions and identities die.

They go in distinct and they leave blurred. Dead. The boys aren’t trained up to be godly, responsible, obedient, hardworking providers, protectors and strong leaders; and the girls are not trained up to be godly, responsible, obedient, homeworking MOTHERS, protectors of life and home, lovers of husbands and children, nurturers of God’s gifts.

In our home (and I know this is true for *many* homeschooling families) we’re seeking to live, learn, love, serve, obey, create, pray and follow the LORD so that we will not be educated otherwise. This phrase: “educated otherwise” comes from listening to talks by Nancy Campbell of Above Rubies. And, O my, I cannot get those thoughts out of my mind… and I don’t long to lose them, either, by the way. Women are/were uniquely created for the most blessed, precious, important, noble and sacred role: motherhood. Women are to be taught to love their husbands, love their children, to be good, chaste, keepers at home. Men are to be taught to be sober, grave, temperate, sound in faith, in charity, in patience (in addition to many other virtues, qualities and characteristics of godly men).

So I say… hmmm… God has designed each for specific and distinct roles and the world seeks to blend, blur and blot them out. Boys could or should be men, but they’re being educated otherwise. Girls could or should be women, but they’re being educated otherwise. I take a moment to ponder and then I am gripped with unquenchable fervor to *be* what God’s designed and called — to teach the children to *be* what God’s designed and called ———and I must go from here: to that calling!
So, why would I send the children to government schools to be educated otherwise?

Another hmmmmmm…

You know… you go along and think that perhaps it’s not all going south. Maybe you’ve overreacted or have been a bit too critical. You think maybe you ought to just sit back, take a deep breath and study the matter a bit longer before making a judgment call on the matter. In yet another “Hmmmmmm….” moment and another shaking of the head and aching in the heart moment I sort of cannot believe a video clip I just watched. No it wasn’t at all akin to the American Family Association’s mail and video clip sent out yesterday… (the vulgar “Gay Pride” parade clip and plea by the AFA to contact reps. regarding the new hate crimes legislation) though that was more than a hmmmmmmmmmm moment – this clip is really perhaps more sickening bcz, while the footage of the pride parade was truly unsettling, it was, after all, clearly a secular event.

What’s grievous about this link/clip is that it was a “church service” and the excuse made by the pastor several minutes into the clip is probably very telling of the state of the church in America. The subtle nuances, the blending of secular and sacred – or worse: a very low view of the holiness of God and honour due Him. So here’s the clip… and maybe coming soon to a church near you: church Springcreek style.

Home Free

I am deeply saddened at the passing of a tremendously blessed and gifted musician, pianist, Roger Bennett.

I will greatly miss his marvelous gift and ability to share gospel truths, encouraging words, laughs and… hope in sorrow. I will miss his integral part of the beautiful dynamic of Legacy 5. I will miss anticipating and attending the music concerts of Legacy 5. What a blessing it is to have most all their CD’s… the music is tremendously inspiring. I love that he wrote of his journey and trials in his Midnight Meditations.

I love that he walked with God – that he trusted Him through the highest and lowest points of his life. I love that he had a fabulous sense of humour. I love that he was compassionate and considerate of others despite his own painful condition. I love that he used the gifting of the LORD to bless others and that the legacy of his life will play on… One of my favourite songs he sand was: Home Free, a Wayne Watson song. So today, I’m remembering Roger Bennett… finally: ultimately healed and: Home free!

Home Free
Wayne Watson

I’m trying hard not to think you unkind
But Heavenly Father
If you know my heart
Surely you can read my mind
Good people underneath the sea of grief
Some get up and walk away
Some will find ultimate relief

Chorus
Home Free, eventually
At the ultimate healing we will be Home Free
Home Free, oh I’ve got a feeling
At the ultimate healing
We will be Home Free

Out in the corridors we pray for life
A mother for her baby, A husband for his wife
Sometimes the good die young
It’s sad but true
And while we pray for one more heartbeat
The real comfort is with you

You know pain has little mercy
And suffering’s no respecter of age, of race or position
I know every prayer gets answered
But the hardest one to pray is slow to come
Oh Lord, not mine, but Thy will be done

Let it be…

Chorus
Home Free, eventually
At the ultimate healing we will be Home Free
Home Free, oh I’ve got a feeling
At the ultimate healing
We will be Home Free

Home Free, eventually
At the ultimate healing gonna be Home Free
Home Free, oh it’s more than a feeling
At the ultimate healing
Gonna be Home Free

Today’s Slices

Blogging is sort of like riding a bike… sometimes it’s easy, like riding on a smooth path; other times it’s a challenge, like a steep incline or like attempting to get back on and ride after falling off the bike. Anyway… this is for my friend who, yesterday, asked me to keep blogging.

So today I don’t really have anything original or inspiring to write but I do have a couple of matters that are weighing on my heart. Ironically, they’re completely unrelated and in the scheme of things have drastically different weight as far as importance goes. But sort of like noticing the potty needs to be scrubbed when you’re on the way to a funeral, sometimes odd things grab our attention. So, I sit here today attempting to catch up on all the mails that need replies and I read of very difficult circumstances, grim realities and heavy loads others bear. Then I consider… bear ye one another’s burdens. And I pray.

I pray for the family of a young lady who, while doing missions’ work in the UK, contracted a flesh eating bacteria and has undergone surgery to amputate the infected leg. I ache for this young woman, I ache for her family and for the one who sent me the mail and link for updates. The enemy may intend things for evil, but God allows them for good, I think as I read the entries. And as I read, I pray for wisdom for them. I would ask others to pray for them as well; her story is here.
Having just gotten off the phone with Kathryn in Uganda, I’m mindful of the sacrifice God calls many to make on His behalf. I’m more mindful than ever that God is the blessed controller of all things and is sovereign and merciful. He can only be merciful and will only do/choose/provide/etc., that which is for our good and His glory. Always and only. So when I think of Kathryn there holding a baby sick with malaria, taking her into her bed for the night to sleep safely under the mosquito net, I think: praise the LORD ~ He is good. How merciful He is to have provided arms to hold that helpless child.

And then I browse through the hundreds of images taken this past weekend as we visited friends in Idaho… a family dedicated to serving the LORD and caring for their husband/father as the ALS continues to weaken his body. They care for every single thing that concerns him as he, for many years, has had no use of limbs – both arms and both legs. But God is truly rich in mercy and His blessing IS on that home and household and He IS guiding and providing. One only need look into the beautiful face of his loyal and dedicated wife to see the tremendous blessing of the LORD. Her eyes smile… what a blessing it is to be taught of the LORD through the testimony of her life.

I’m getting ready to attend the Pacific Northwest Above Rubies Retreat this weekend. I look forward to not only seeing/hearing Nancy Campbell, but also to spending time with sisters in the LORD and with women I rarely see or only see once a year. It’s a sweet time of fellowship that I treasure. I’ll be missing Kathryn as I’ve come to so delight in sharing these sorts of occasions with her now that she’s older… but I’m so pleased to have Hannah come down for the retreat for one of the days. She’s doing Kathryn’s nannying work while she’s away and so is prevented from attending the whole weekend. I think she’ll enjoy the time ~ and the blessing of Nancy Campbell.

I think it’s interesting how the LORD has used and is using Nancy in women’s lives and homes. I think it’s interesting how, like Elisabeth Elliot, she’s used to reach so many women on so many levels – young and old, rich or poor – across the globe. Interesting too, that they both do not fit the stereotypical “modern Christian woman” and don’t even attempt to. I think that’s one (among many) of the things, I respect most about them both. They’re not attempting put on a “sports stadium” event for women. In fact, I’d hazard to guess that many would be turned off by their message. But it’s fairly obvious that many (many-many???) Christian women are turned off by the truths of the Word. It’s foolishness to them and it’s “old-fashioned” to them. I guess that’s why I pray so fervently that women will read the Word, pray and study to know the will and way of the LORD. His Word is plain—it’s true and simple. I am praying many will be touched with the message of the pure Word and that their hearts will be turned to the LORD, to their husbands, to their homes and to their children and their lives will reflect His glory.

I will look up

If I look down and see my feet and the rocky ground beneath — or look down and see not my feet but shifting waves crashing all around me, a wave of panic washes over me and I fear I will sink or be washed away in the flood of fear.

But, in the most peculiar of all, the most wonderful of all experiences I know is the sweet peace that washes over when I look not down but up — when I lift my eyes and see that not only am I not in perilous straits or not only am I not sinking in the mire, but I am being lifted up and it is in the able hand of the LORD that I stand.

All around me points to possible failure and loss, all around me the tasks are too great and I, in those moments of despair, see I cannot possibly do this task of guiding this home, teaching these children, directing them on the path, filling all the needs and doing all that needs to be done. All around me, the giants of doubt hover. The enemy brings to mind past failures and accomplishments seem to pale in comparison to the number of losses.

But wait.

What does God say… what’s really true?

The eternal God is thy refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms: and he shall thrust out the enemy from before thee; and shall say, Destroy them.”

Deuteronomy 33.27

O, blessed morning, sweet, sweet morning… I look out to see the sunrise and I cannot count or name all the blessings of the LORD. Sunshine floods my home and I cannot list quickly enough the ways of His gracious mercy. In giving thanks I see that this is His home, these are His children, my husband is His man and He has, is and will guide my husband’s steps — all of our needs, all of our hopes, all of our plans are in His Hands.

Why would I fear? Who else is there beside the LORD? Why would I resort to the shifting sand? Why would I look down? Why do I have this work of being a homemaker, doing all these tasks, looking after these children and missing the others? I instantly stand and clutch the blessing of the plan and work of the LORD in my life and I gladly walk in this path and zealously guard it. For I would want no other to take my place in this home and no offender to come in. I would want no other task and pray to not squander these blessings another minute to doubt or fear.

I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help.
2 My help cometh from the LORD, which made heaven and earth.
3 He will not suffer thy foot to be moved: he that keepeth thee will not slumber.
4 Behold, he that keepeth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep.
5 The LORD is thy keeper: the LORD is thy shade upon thy right hand.
6 The sun shall not smite thee by day, nor the moon by night.
7 The LORD shall preserve thee from all evil: he shall preserve thy soul.
8 The LORD shall preserve thy going out and thy coming in from this time forth, and even for evermore.

Psalm 121.1