Thankful for the Thorns (and the storms I never see)

   teacuppamela.pngI’ve been thinking about Thanks giving and have been thanking the LORD for His timing, for His intervention, for His wise provision and for the storms I never see. 

I was browsing my mails and as I was reading a few lines from a list mail from Nancy Lee DeMoss – I read a quote that was familiar to me:

quotebegin.gifMy God, I have never thanked Thee for my thorn! I have thanked Thee a thousand times for my roses, but never once for my thorn. Teach me the glory of the cross I bear. Teach me the value of my thorns. Show me that I have climbed to Thee by the path of pain. Show me that my tears have made my rainbow.
—George Matheson (1842–1906)

I was reminded of a story I received by email several years ago…  (this is quoted in the following story as well)  it, too, touched my heart as I had gone through a particularly trying year and was probably wondering what beauty would come from all those thorny spots.  But, when the thorny times come — when the tough times leave me feeling scraped up, I’ve tried to remember that the beautiful blooms are at the ends of thorny canes and the sweetest fragrance comes from flowers on the bushes with the most thorns.  

Here’s the story I was reminded to read…

The Thanksgiving Special

Author unknown


quotebegin.gifSandra felt as low as the heels of her Birkenstocks as she pushed against a November gust and the florist shop door. Her life had been easy, like a spring breeze. Then in the fourth month of her second pregnancy, an automobile accident had stolen her ease. During this Thanksgiving week she would have delivered a son. She grieved over her loss. As if that weren’t enough, her husband’s company threatened a transfer. Then her sister, whose holiday visit she coveted, called saying she could not come. What’s worse, Sandra’s friend infuriated her by suggesting her grief was a God-given path to maturity that would allow her to empathize with others who suffer.

Has she lost a child?—No. She has no idea what I’m feeling. Sandra shuddered. Thanksgiving? Thankful for what?—she wondered. For a careless driver whose truck was hardly scratched when he rear-ended her? For an airbag that saved her life but took that of her child?

“Good afternoon. Can I help you?” The flower shop clerk’s approach startled her. “Sorry,” said the clerk, whose name was Jenny. “I just didn’t want you to think I was ignoring you.”

“I need an arrangement.”

“For Thanksgiving?”

Sandra nodded.

“Do you want beautiful but ordinary, or would you like to challenge the day with a customer favorite I call the Thanksgiving Special?” Jenny saw Sandra’s curiosity and continued. “I’m convinced that flowers tell stories, that each arrangement suggests a particular feeling. Are you looking for something that conveys gratitude this Thanksgiving?”

“Not exactly!” Sandra blurted. “Sorry, but in the last five months, everything that could have gone wrong has.”

Sandra regretted her outburst but was surprised when Jenny said, “I have the perfect arrangement for you.” The door’s small bell suddenly rang.

“Barbara! Hi,” Jenny said. “I have your order ready. Just a moment.” She politely excused herself from Sandra and walked toward a small workroom. She quickly reappeared carrying a massive arrangement of greenery, bows, and long-stemmed thorny roses. Only, the ends of the rose stems were neatly snipped, no flowers. “Want this in a box?” Jenny asked.

Sandra watched for Barbara’s response. Was this a joke? Who would want rose stems and no flowers! She waited for laughter, for someone to notice the absence of flowers atop the thorny stems, but neither woman did.

“Yes, please. It’s exquisite,” said Barbara. “You’d think after three years of getting the Special, I’d not be so moved by its significance, but it’s happening again. My family will love this one. Thanks.”

Sandra stared. Why so normal a conversation about so strange an arrangement? she wondered. Sandra pointed and blurted out, “That lady just left with, uh…”

“Yes?”

“Well, she had no flowers!”

“Right, I cut off the flowers.”

“Off?”

“Off. Yep. That’s the special. I call it the Thanksgiving Thorns Bouquet.”

“But, why do people pay for that?” In spite of herself, Sandra chuckled.

“Do you really want to know?”

“I couldn’t leave this shop without knowing. I’d think about nothing else!”

“Barbara came into the shop three years ago feeling very much like you feel today,” Jenny explained. “She thought she had very little to be thankful for. She had lost her father to cancer, the family business was failing, her son was taking drugs, and she faced major surgery.”

“Ouch!” said Sandra.

“That same year,” Jenny explained, “I had lost my husband. I assumed complete responsibility for the shop and for the first time, spent the holidays alone. I had no children, no husband, no family nearby, and too great a debt to allow any travel.”

“What did you do?”

“I learned to be thankful for thorns.”

Sandra’s eyebrows lifted. “Thorns?”

“I’m a Christian. I’ve always thanked God for good things in life and I never thought to ask Him why good things happened to me. But when bad stuff hit, did I ever ask! It took time to learn that dark times are important. I had always enjoyed the ‘flowers’ of life but it took thorns to show me the beauty of God’s comfort. You know, the Bible says that God comforts us when we’re afflicted and from His consolation we learn to comfort others.”

Sandra gasped. “A friend read that passage to me and I was furious! I guess the truth is I don’t want comfort. I’ve lost a baby and I’m angry with God.” She started to ask Jenny to go on when the door’s bell diverted their attention.

“Hey, Phil!” shouted Jenny as a balding, rotund man entered the shop. She softly touched Sandra’s arm and moved to welcome him. He pulled her to his side for a warm hug. “I’m here for twelve thorny long-stemmed stems!” Phil laughed, heartily.

“I figured as much,” said Jenny. “I’ve got them ready.” She lifted a tissue-wrapped arrangement from the refrigerated cabinet.

“Beautiful,” said Phil. “My wife will love them.”

Sandra could not resist asking. “These are for your wife?” Phil saw that Sandra’s curiosity matched his when he first heard of a thorn bouquet. “If you don’t mind my asking, why thorns?”

“I don’t mind. In fact, I’m glad you asked,” he said. “Four years ago my wife and I nearly divorced. After forty years, we were in a real mess, but we slogged through, problem by rotten problem. We rescued our marriage—our love, really. Last Thanksgiving I stopped in here for flowers. I must have mentioned surviving a tough process because Jenny told me that for a long time she had kept a vase of rose stems—stems! —as a reminder of what she had learned from thorny times. That was good enough for me. I took home stems. My wife and I decided to label each one for a specific thorny situation and give thanks for what the problem taught us. I’m pretty sure this stem review is becoming a tradition.”

Phil paid Jenny, thanked her again, and as he left, said to Sandra, “I highly recommend the Special!”

“I don’t know if I can be thankful for the thorns in my life,” Sandra said to Jenny.

“Well, my experience says that the thorns make the roses more precious. We treasure God’s providential care more during trouble than at any other time. Remember, Jesus wore a crown of thorns so that we might know His love. Do not resent thorns.”
Tears rolled down Sandra’s cheeks. For the first time since the accident she loosened her grip on resentment. “I’ll take twelve long-stemmed thorns, please.”

“I was hoping you would,” Jenny said. “I’ll have them ready in a minute. Then, every time you see them, remember to appreciate both good and hard times. We grow through both.”

“Thank you. What do I owe you?”

“Nothing. Nothing but a pledge to work toward healing your heart. The first year’s arrangement is always on me.” Jenny handed a card to Sandra. “I’ll attach a card like this to your arrangement, but maybe you’d like to read it first. It’s a prayer that was written by a man who was blind. Go ahead, read it.”

My God, I have never thanked Thee for my thorn! I have thanked Thee a thousand times for my roses, but never once for my thorn. Teach me the glory of the cross I bear. Teach me the value of my thorns. Show me that I have climbed to Thee by the path of pain. Show me that my tears have made my rainbow.
—George Matheson (1842–1906)

Jenny said, “Happy Thanksgiving, Sandra,” handing her the Special. “I look forward to our knowing each other better.”
Sandra smiled. She turned, opened the door and walked toward hope.quoteend.gif pamelasig2.jpg

Thanksgiving prepping…

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The Thanksgiving preparations are underway at our house… the different breads have been cooked and cubed and are drying in preparation for the dressing in a couple of days.  I made cranberry relish (finely chopped cranberries, oranges and sugar) and it’s in the fridge melding.  Yep, melding… it’s the key to most all good soups and sauces (and people, too).   Next, I have put the bread ‘n butter pickles in the fridge to chill — these are the pickles I made at the end of August… mmm, mmmm, mmm!!  I got the freezer jam out of the freezer and set it in the fridge so that it’ll be ready to serve on Thursday, too.  The chickens are thawing and I’ve gathered the garlic, herbs and onions from the garden — these will go into the chickens I’ll be roasting.

Can you start to see the theme of this year’s Thanksgiving meal?  Yes – as much as possible, we’re using things that grew here on the land or that we raised here.  We didn’t grow Jello — so that Jello pretzel salad I’ll be making didn’t grow here – but the raspberries, which will be part of it, did. ;o)  I am simmering the sweet potatoes right now and they will be baked up in a casserole that our family just loves for Thanksgiving.  Here are some more helpful Thanksgiving hints from our site.

I thought I’d include a video in case you’ve never roasted a chicken *and* to show you how I am planning to prepare our chicken so that it will have a ‘traditional’ Thanksgiving taste!!  This will be the second time in thirty years that we haven’t made a turkey for Thanksgiving.  Strange.  Strange but good.  We’re doing this for many reasons – but one thing we’ve learned about making foods for Thanksgiving is long-term planning and part of this year’s long-term planning included making sure I set aside the foods we’d need for this day (and that meant canning, freezing, drying or purchasing them) but I forgot one of the main ingredients.  Yes.  The turkey.When we were in our grand chicken experiment – and all the things we had to learn along the way in raising chickens – we weren’t thinking: turkey.We were thinking: chicken and chicken tractors and waterers and all that stuff. And that was enough.  At the time.  Now, it’s Thanksgiving and I’m wondering why weren’t we thinking: t-u-r-k-e-y?

Tomorrow I’ll roast the pumpkins, puree and prepare them for pumpkin pies.  The wheat we ordered from Eastern Washington will be ground into flour… and apples from  papa’s tree will be sliced for the pies. We’ll probably only have one walnut and one hazelnut pie — using nuts from the trees here.  The squirrels sure beat us to most all the nuts this year and we weren’t gathering them as we ought to have done as they fell to the ground.  Sure reminds me of the Proverb… consider the ant…

I pray the LORD will remind me to live *in* each season preparing for the next… occupying in the moment in light of the next moment… ever mindful that actions always have consequences.

Happy Thanksgiving!

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You just gotta wonder… that 7 day challenge

teacuppamela.pngI don’t know about this one.  I mean, I know about this – and read the article and listened to the challenge and I think I ‘get’ what he’s trying to accomplish and the point he’s trying to drive home – but I’m just really wondering about the sheer lack of godly wisdom there… and I’m really wondering what it’ll be like tomorrow morning when the church meeting begins – will there be snickering, will everyone be looking around at the other folks?  Will they be self conscious?  Will there be chiding and joking or will this very sensitive and private matter just be left alone.

Texas pastor, Ed Young, challenged ‘his congregation‘ to 7 days of intimacy – says he thinks his church will have been the happiest place in America after this.  But what of all those for whom the challenge was a challenge?  Over the years I’ve received many letters from women for whom this challenge would be totally over the top – women who have longed for the intimacy but the “programming” of it or the demand just sends them to the edge. I wonder if there’s been any help or hope for whom this challenge would bring painful consequences or reactions.

So, yeah… I seriously pray the man will be sensitive tomorrow as the church gathers – it’s sort of too late to pray he will be wise – well, maybe I pray he will be a truly wise man from here on out.  I mean, we all learn from silly things we say and do.  Well, most of us learn.  Some just remain wiseguys.

And there’s a huge difference between wise men and wise guys.

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a conversation

  teacuppamela So, tell me about you.  And thus began a very long conversation.  Have you ever asked someone that?  I mean asked them and really meant to be asking the question bcz you really wanted to know — and not for information’s sake but for love – that’s all, just for love.  Well, that’s how my conversation with my cousin began. 

Just for love, that’s all. I loathe actions done for anything else. That’s been a character quality that has brought me both great peace and great anguish.  Great peace bcz I’m a what-you-see-is-what-you-get person.  Great anguish bcz what you see is not necessarily what you see — tell you why.  When you see a seemingly confident person, chances are very good that what you see is not what’s really going on.  O, you may see happy – but happy is learned, happy is a decision… you may see confidence – you may think you see a self assured person, but underneath is a very un-self-assured person.  That’s not to say that seemingly self-assured person is not confident in what they are saying – but that the person is very confident in what they’re saying but not confident being the person saying it.  So, that’s me.  Glad by choice – and not necessarily confident, but confident in what I’m saying – confident bcz God is and has been faithful and I trust in Him.

I guess it’s why I lean so heavily on the “we have this treasure in earthen vessels” verse and feel it so strongly.  It’s another reason why I tell you that line from time to time: I have no mouth and yet I must scream (good line, probably not a good book).  And… that is why two words are so totally profound to me.  Those two words are:  But God.

My cousin and I share life changing events that occurred at the same time  nearly 40 years ago.  Neither of us – probably not fully even to this day – realized how life altering those events would be.  I don’t think any of us — at the time — grasp the significance of what will later become defining moments of our lives.  It was the great collision of my life — which I believe God allowed for my good and His glory.  It was an intersection of my life and my cousin’s life.   And we talked at length about it the other night… and I cried for hours following that conversation.

In that month of August there were two deaths – the death for my cousin was the horrific suicide death of his father. It was a very sad time – crazy emotional.  The other death?  For me – was the death of innocence as I was molested by the man my mother was married to at the time and. is. not. now.  Death that occurs in sexual abuse is like a shooting at point-blank range – only you never see the weapon, the wound, the trail of blood, there is no coroner summoned… and no funeral.  It’s just a quiet death. On the outside.  But I didn’t know at the time that my uncle’s death was not the only death that happened that month.  The reality of the second death that month would be drawn out for three years and then — years later — would be recognized for what it really was.  That collision in the intersection was life changing for me.

There were a lot of people in that intersection that month — it’s taken me years to look at that mental photograph and see all the faces – and longer for me to see the lives behind the faces and what that collision meant.  To us all.  And problem with blogging is – for people like me – that there’s so much to say and it’s been important for me to say it all — but I have to continually gauge the appropriateness of the telling — that’s what’s more important.  All along, this blog’s been a tool to help people see they’re not alone – it’s a place I share what God’s done with what the enemy intended evil and a place for other women to see there is freedom at the foot of the Cross.

The longer I live, the more I see that people like me have this huge need to know and be known – it’s but a part of that refusal to keep dark secrets hidden.   And there’s a –huge– difference between discreetly honouring confidences and hiding dark secrets, lies and indiscretions.

 

O, what is upon us?

teacuppamela.png I’ve been pretty wrapped up these past days.  Our grandchildren had been with us for ten days and then this week has brought an amazing reuniting with a cousin I haven’t seen for over 40 years — I cannot even believe it though I’ve had a couple of days to consider it.  For a couple of days now I haven’t been able to keep thoughts straight as I have been thinking of our long conversation – things that never get talked about, family patterns, memories, tragedies and God’s wonderful redemption – beauty from ashes.

So…….. here I am browsing the news, catching up on mails and marveling over the events of these days.  O, truly, these surely must be last days.  O, I pray we will redeem the time – for these days – these days truly are evil days and the peril of this nation is evident.  O, for a remnant that will speak the Truth of God, stand up for the Word of God, His salvation and call to repentance.

Remember my ‘what if it’s true?‘ questions?  Well, what if it’s true?  What if it’s true that BObama is not genuinely a US born citizen?  What if it’s true that his birth certificate is not authentic?  I mean I’m just sayin…  A WorldNet Daily article on the matter.  Sad thing is that even if Obama is not a US born citizen – He’s been selected.  America will not (as a whole) stand for righteousness or stand for truth.

More articles of political interest at Judicial Watch

But…………………………….. you could also listen to this: A Call To Anguish – David Wilkerson
Powerful.   [Not light listening!!]   These are incredible days in which to be alive.  David Wilkerson distinguishes between anguish and concern.  Are you  little by little changing?  Are you, little by little, losing the love of God, the love of Christ?  Nehemiah didn’t ask: Why?   God is allowing much to happen in and to America… Daniel 9.

O, that men would turn to the LORD.

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What’s on your schedule for this week…

teacuppamela.pngI have a sweet friend who routinely asks me: What’s on your schedule for this week?  and I usually proceed to tell her something like: Hmmm… just the usual;  housekeeping, gardening, baking and schooling… and then I may tell of the significant event of the week or whatever.  And, that’s pretty much how weeks go.  The dailies and some event or another — always keeping in mind the time-tested reality that the week will never go how I thought it would — that I will look back and marvel that the days each seemed long but the week just flew by.

That’s pretty much how life’s gone over the years and now, instead of saying the days were long but the weeks flew by, I say: the weeks are long but the months just fly on by.  Every week seems to have sort of a character of its own and this week looks to be no different.  Here’s this morning’s snapshot of what our week might look like:

flood graph 11-10-08

This is a static chart… updates every 6 hours or so… here.

So, yeah… I’m ironing today… gardening… thinking of painting a room and I’m laughing.  A lot.

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boys.

So,I forgot that on election night our boys had a soccer (I know, Timothy:  futbol!!) game and Sam was playing and in a close and exciting match there was a bit of fancy footwork and an ensuing fall… and he came up with a broken finger.  I attempted to call Wes so that he could take Sam to the ER – but Wes was with Hannah at the obedience school for her new dog (yes, that’s another long story!).  Well… in the midst of groaning over the very sore hand and the groaning over the election results – Wes returned home to take Samuel in to the ER – and to add to the excitement of the evening, in a play after Samuel fell – Stephen (playing goalie) was kicked in the hand and so – just for an added dimension, Wes took him along to the ER, too.  It was a bit of comic relief as several of the kids came over after the soccer game to celebrate Stephen’s birthday — yes, that was in there, too… anyway, they were eating ice cream cake and comparing injury play-by-play’s.

I know I’m sure going to miss these days someday…  Someday, I’ll be sitting here at my desk looking back… I know I’ll miss these days.

sam's broken finger