What if today was your last?

What if you knew today was the last day you’d be alive. What would you do — or how would you spend this day? It seems that most of the time people think of what’s on their “bucket list” — you know, the list of stuff people want to do before they die. I don’t know why the thought of death triggers an urgency to get out the bucket list to see what could be done. But I was thinking that, in reality, the bucket list is a pretty self-serving deal and pretty much adds nothing to the lives left behind.

I wrote the above and a few more lines for my Welcome Home page on Facebook this morning.  I’ve thought about it throughout the day as I’ve worked in and around our home.  I thought about it as I drove into town on an errand.  What if today was my last day to…

My thoughts drifted into different areas of life.  I thought of the different people in my life — my husband, my children, my parents, all the extended family, my church family and friends… I thought of all the intersecting circles of acquaintances and wondered what I’d do if I really knew today was my last day to see them, to talk to them, to thank them, to bless them… what if I never have another opportunity to see them again?

I think I’ll start a new journal — a thankfulness journal or a gratefulness journal or a gladness journal.  I don’t know what I’ll eventually call it, but I will start to write one and the title will come to me, I’m sure.  Maybe I’ll call it the blessing book.  Yes, that would be a perfect name — bcz I want to write all the blessings I can remember.  O, I’ve done this through the years in all my journals: recording whatever blessing is happening at the time — but I’ve never written a book of blessings — everything in one place.  It would be a perfect book to write bcz I also want to write down the things I want to give people — in terms of blessings.  I want to record the blessings I pray the Lord will work in specific individual’s lives.   So, it’ll be a book of what’s been done for me, what I’ve seen done for others and what I pray the Lord will work in people’s lives.

As an example, I will write the blessings of marriage — and then, specifically, my marriage to my husband.  Not just the wedding, but what God has done through the years bcz of this blessing.  I pray our children — each one — will know the blessing of marriage.  I pray our daughters will know the blessings of motherhood and I pray our sons will know the blessings of fatherhood.   I will write the different faith-builders — the valleys, the mountaintops and pray the Lord will do so in their lives as well.

If this were the last day I could live on the earth, I’d want to be careful to express my gratitude — I hope I wouldn’t want to see one more sunset, eat one more this or that thing, experience one more major accomplishment.   I hope I’d remember to tell each one of my children some specific way they’ve blessed me and how I pray for different and specific things for each of them.  I hope I’d remember to say important things instead of wanting to linger to accomplish more things.

If this were the last day I could live on this earth, I’d want it to be a profitable day for the memories of the people I love.  I wouldn’t want them to remember: On mama’s last day, she checked off another item on her bucket list.  No.  I’d want them to remember an encouraging word, a prayer, a joyful memory, a word of inspiration, a kiss of thanks.

I’d want my last day to be a blessing – so that when it was over, a fragrance would linger.

3 thoughts on “What if today was your last?

  1. Pamela,
    That was so beautifully put. I keep “trying” to work on journaling, but I feel like I fail every time I start, because I forget to write for a day or two, which turns into weeks, etc. I will try again though, because I know how important it is to see things that God has done in our lives and in others lives and if we don’t write them down we will forget(even if we don’t think we will). So thank you for the reminder and more importantly the reminder to live each day to the fullest for others, instead of for ourselves.

  2. Lori,
    What a beautiful post and great admonition to me and to us all. I totally get what you were saying about comments we make (or are tempted to make) to our about our husbands (or anyone else, for that matter).
    Thank you for your thoughtful writing – I appreciate the different topics you tackle. May the Lord bless you more and more. Thanks, again — pamela

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