The Love Dare Journal — Day 6

Love is not Irritable.
This chapter begins with a verse from Proverbs 16.32
And then continues, “Love is hard to offend and quick to forgive.”

To be irritable means ‘to be near the point of a knife.’ Not far from being poked.  People who are irritable are locked, loaded, and ready to overreact.”

I know I get irritable when there’s a deadline and I’ve not adequately prepared for it… when I don’t feel well and don’t have a quick solution… when I don’t have a meal prepared on time or when I’ve not planned well enough for an event or when I think things will never change in this or that person’s life — in all this — even knowing that there’s nothing whatsoever I can do about the situation, I still fret and become irritable sometimes — but I determine not to be irritable with my husband.   I have continually striven to stop and recount the ways of the LORD and His dealings and have sought to live in accordance with His Word — bcz it is there that I know I will find hope and peace for certian.

A little further on in the chapter we read,

A loving husband will remain calm and patient showing mercy and restraining his temper.  Rage and violence are out of the question.  A loving wife is not overly sensitive or cranky but exercises emotional control.  She chooses to be a flower among the thorns and respond pleasantly during prickly situations.”

The book suggests that there are at least two key reasons for irritability — stress and selfishness.   Of selfishness we read:

When you are irritable, the heart of the problem is primarily a problem of the heart.”  (Matthew 12.34)

I smiled as I read differences between people and the characteristics of fruits — peaches and lemons.  So, when things get stressful and the squeeze is on… remember lemons and peaches — be a peach, the result is sweet.

Being easily angered is an indicator that a hidden area of selfishness or insecurity is present where love is supposed to rule.  But selfishness also wears many other masks:  Lust… Bitterness… Greed… Pride…  These motivations can never be satisfied. But when love enters…”

I liked the analogies and comparisons.  I like ‘two things’ type lists — catchy phrases, and the exhortation in this chapter to “respond… with patience and encouragement rather than anger and exasperation.”

Today’s Dare

Choose today to react to tough circumstances in your marriage in loving ways instead of with irritation.  Begin by making a list below of areas where you need to add margin to your schedule.  The list any wrong motivations that you need to release from your life [I would write:  list any wrong motivations you need to repent of, confess as sin and seek forgiveness for].
_____ Check here when you’ve completed today’s dare.”

To the questions, I am mulling over my responses — I know I need to work on priorities and to stay ahead of my work — for I am learning more and more that I will neglect important things or drop important things — schedule-wise — instead of saying or volunteering in advance that I cannot do something by a specific date/time.  I recognize that these failures lead to irritability — the very last thing I want to be / respond.

Where do you need to add margin to your life?  When have you recently overreacted?  What was your real motivation behind it?  What decisions have you made today?

I’m mulling this over — especially in light of some recent health problems in which I have had to realize I am not handling things as well as I had thought and that I need to not fret about things — I need to just rest in what I can do today and not get caught up in what others are doing or what I think they might be thinking if I don’t have this or that thing done.  My husband’s been very, very helpful to me in seeing these things.  O, for grace to trust the LORD with things I grieve over — things I cannot do anything about.