Author: pamela

The First Seat on the Right Side of the Center Aisle

I wrote the following a few years after our firstborn son was married in 1998.  Thinking back on that day, reflecting on all that’s transpired and all that’s happening currently, I decided to get this out and reread it.  The same mama, similar feelings, better understanding… as plans are underway for another son who’ll marry next week.  I’m so thankful I’ve had a little more time and a few more experiences so this time is not so overwhelming (and, I don’t have a  2+ week old newborn this time).  But the emotions?  They’re very much the same.  And here you have another glimpse of my life — and maybe yours, too. Continue reading “The First Seat on the Right Side of the Center Aisle”

The Amazing Mind

 This is a good example of a Brain Study: If you can read this OUT LOUD you have a strong mind.  And better than that: Alzheimer’s is a long, long, ways down the road before it ever gets anywhere near you.

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If you can read this, you have a strange mnid, too. Only 55 people out of 100 can.  I cdnuolt blveiee that I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd what I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno’t mtaetr in what oerdr the ltteres in a word are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is that the frsit and last ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can still raed it whotuit a pboerlm. This is bcuseaethe huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the word as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! If you can raed this forwrad it

This is posted simply because there is so much foolishness going on all around us… so much political posturing and so much distortion of truth, honour, decency… so much ignorance and so much emotional manipulation going on.  I thought I’d post this piece I received by email — in hopes you’ll see just how marvelously and specially you’ve been created.  You are loved with an everlasting love and underneath are the everlasting arms.

A Patient Woman

A beautiful image is brought to my mind as I think of… a patient woman.  Conversely, what an ugly image is brought to mind at the thought of an impatient woman.  It takes me no time to bring up recollections of impatience (on my part or on the part of another).  But what I seek is for ready responses of patience – patient thoughts, patient replies to requests, patient understanding.

So beautiful is the woman who patiently waits, patiently listens, patiently answers, patiently watches, patiently prays.  I long for this  peaceable fruit of righteousness.  Though there are times my actions appear that I’ve not the vaguest understanding of patience, each day I have new mercies from the Lord to press on – renewed desire to live the Truth I know-that-I-know I believe.  And, I’m learning that this is part of what patience does: it presses on.  So, regardless how things seem to me to be today, Christ being my strength and my guide, I press on.  I want to be longsuffering — not preoccupied with how things feel or how long things are taking or how long things have been difficult or whatever.  How ever long something takes,  I want to be about His ways, preoccupied with trust, with faith, with peace.  I know this is right and what I really want — but my flesh gets all caught up in the temporal things and I appear to forget the eternal things in the stressful, anxious moments — in the seemingly never ending waiting for situations to turn around.  It’s the stuff of life.  Interestingly, I’m finding it’s not so much the big stuff, it’s the accumulation of a lot of small things (that sometimes feel huge and overwhelming)… a wayward child, an extended illness, financial reverses, troubles with family or friends, weight or health issues,  communication difficulties.  Well, you get the idea and probably understand what I’m talking about.

When I’m seeking to improve/correct an area, I know I must go only to the Word.  So when this matter came to my mind and I genuinely knew I must act on it.  So, I read in Galatians and reflected on the different facets of the nine-fold fruit of the Spirit (love, joy, peace, longsuffering [patience], gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance),  I considered them individually, though they are, indeed, integral parts of the whole.   And while we might look at each aspect as we seek to develop different character qualities in our lives, they remain inextricably one fruit.

Then, a little further on in Ephesians 5.8-11, I read: “For ye were sometimes darkness, but now are ye light in the Lord: walk as children of light:   (For the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness and righteousness and truth;) Proving what is acceptable unto the Lord.   And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them.”

So then I consider the fruit of the Spirit and the light of the Lord, and when I’m impatient or lack patience for someone or some situation, it must be that I’d turned my eyes from the Lord, it must be that I’ve stopped drinking long from the well of His Word or I’ve neglected to hold fast those things I  know to be true.  Ouch, right?  I know that, intellectually speaking, I get this.  But to DO these things — I relate to what Paul wrote about doing that which I do not want to do and not doing that which I would do.   Ah, that war in the members!    O, that I would seek to be as Samuel – (1Samuel 3.19)  “And Samuel grew, and the LORD was with him, and did let none of His words fall to the ground.”

I want to hang on to the truths I want to govern my thoughts and actions and I want to respond in such a manner as to demonstrate Who’s governing my thoughts.  When I’m faced with an opportunity to respond to a situation, I’m reminding myself to stop! and evaluate my response.  Interestingly, simply asking myself: Is this thought/response fruitful (fruit-filled!) ? Or, is this an ugly response?  Amazingly, I see the Lord correcting my thoughts and filling me with the sort of patience I long to have.

May the Lord be with you and may you always be blessed.

Things aren’t as ___ .

Hey… how’s your day going?  Anybody ask you that yet today?  What’s going on in the theater of your mind today?  I hope you’ll be encouraged on many levels today.

I can’t pinpoint the thing that drew me to remembering this today — to humming this song (The “Sunscreen” song… a piece attributed to Baz Luhrman that he used by permission, originally written by Mary Schmich). If it’s too loud, turn down your speakers… the intent here is not to blare some rappy tune but I hope a few of these life-experience tidbits of advice might be of some encouragement to you.  The thought that things aren’t always as they seem keeps running through my mind today.

Truly, the longer I live, the more I see blatantly, that things aren’t always as _____ as they seem.  You know, the bleak, sad, hard, difficult, long, terrible, fat, earth-shattering… whatever things.  It’s hard to remember this sometimes, though, isn’t it?!?  It’s not until we look at the big picture or the bigger picture that we gain a bit of perspective.  And, ultimately, it’s not until we look at God’s picture — His design — His character — His purposes — His promises — that we gain proper perspective.  Regardless our circumstances.  It only takes a moment of looking back, looking around or looking in the Word to see that our thoughts or perspectives or circumstances are not the only thing going on, not the worst thing happening — or, not the most important thing occurring.  Everybody’s got stuff going on — everyone’s facing challenges or a lot of whatever.  Everyone’s got questions, a bombardment of opinions, decisions, thoughts.  Everyone’s dealing with something.  And, to be sure,  it’s not in a song, a philosophy, a regimen or in whatever or wherever else we might try to find peace and truth.  It really is in the Person of Jesus Christ and in His life and the marvelous Truth of His Word we find all we need for life.  But, in life, when we most need to seek answers, when we most need help we often least ask for, see or accept it.

It is always there…

2Timothy 3.16  All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:.
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Lies Women Believe

I’ve been working through a workbook to a book I read a number of years ago — Nancy Leigh DeMoss’s Lies Women Believe and now, the corresponding workbook.  I’ll be writing more on this.  So, I’ve been rereading some things I read years ago and marveled that I’m still dealing with several of the same struggles. Interestingly, it’s part of what’s gotten me to work on habits, thought patterns and more.  I’d been wanting to work through/eliminate the struggles, but it’s always too daunting to revisit painful areas of life or, realizing how little progress I’ve made and the why’s behind the what’s happening now in some of my thoughts and reactions to things makes resolutions difficult.  But one thing I’m continually reminded of is the great fact that when things aren’t going right or my thoughts and reactions aren’t right, they can usually be traced back to a lie I’ve believed or something I’ve not recognized as a lie — but a lie nonetheless: something contrary to what God says.  Thus, when struggles come, there’s a decision that must be made at that juncture:  Am I going to fall into the lie? Am I going to entertain the lie (about myself or about my situation or about someone else)?  Or, am I going to ask: What does God say about this — what has God done about this — What is true here?   Again, troubles and temptations we face can usually be traced back to a lie we’ve believed.  And our next actions need to be based on Truth — or we’ll repeat the same sin spiral.

I viewed some of Nancy’s clips and then came across this one with Jennifer Rothschild and thought it might be helpful to someone today — now, some of this breaks down and there could be some argument as to some aspects of the points, so I encourage grace here so that the Truths can be understood  and some freedom realized.  I took notes and posted them below the clip for you:

Here’s a mini recap:
Lie #1: Who I am and what I struggle with is the same thing.
I am my weakness.  My struggle identifies me – my weakness defines me.  Your struggle is not what defines you, it’s what God can use to refine you.  We are not the culmination of what we’ve failed at… who we are is a reflection of God’s strength in our weakness.  Who you are is not what you struggle with.  Who you are is who God says you are.

Lie #2: Who I am and What I do is the same thing.
You are not a human doing – you are a human being. Our identity is not what we do, it’s who He says we are. It’s a lie to base our identity upon what we do — we must base our identity on what God says; His Word never changes.

Lie #3: Who I am is not good enough.
When we live with a Performance driven mentality, rather than a Provision driven mentality, we’ll inevitably feel like what we do is not good enough, because we don’t always perform perfectly and we make the mistake of   associating our performance with what makes us acceptable.  And that’s not true.  But when we live with a Provision driven mentality, we recognize that what God has performed on our behalf or what He’s provided is always acceptable.

So, here’s Jennifer’s advice, are you believing lies?  check out your behaviour…. it reveals what you believe.  Look in the New Testament — seek all the I AM statements about Jesus.  See who He is.  Make the connection: How does His life, His identity impact your life, impact your identity and how does that impact your belief system and therefore, your behaviour.

Habits

It’s sure hard to change habits, isn’t it?!?!  Habits are so engrained in us that sometimes probably often times we think we’re never ever going to change — our flesh is selfish!!  We often think maybe we just need more will power or more self control.  Have you thought this, too?   I sure have… I’ve thought that after all this time, I sure ought to be____________, or I sure ought to have done__________; but I’m not and/or I haven’t.  I know I have desire, I have ability, I have resources… and then I think on “will-power” – you know, the depletable resource we try to keep going, trying to refuel until we realize we’ve run out of fuel? This may happen over an hour, a day or a week or longer.   The thing that’s so hard is that shear “will-power” is short lived – it’s so easily depleted.  It often seems that will-power is vapor… but for sure, it’s depletable.

de·plete/diˈplēt/

  • Use up the supply of; exhaust the abundance of.
  • Diminish in number or quantity.

    • Synonyms: exhaust – drain – empty – use up – evacuate

    I’ve come to see that it’s actually a very good thing  that “will-power” is short lived and so easily depleted. I sure see that it’s why I so often see my need of the Lord so significantly — if I could do all this stuff on my own, I would think I didn’t need Him.  And because I’ve seen I cannot do all this stuff on my own: I *do* need Him.  I shake my head wondering why I continually live like I don’t need Him…  Like, I’ve got this, Lord, I’ll call on You if things get tough.  Fact is, I don’t always call on Him *when* things get tough.  And it’s never, ever a question of whether things will get tough or not — for, sure things will get tough.

    So… I’m reading different things about repatterning behaviour – or, as one author says, overwriting a bad habit with new behaviour.  The premise is that bad habits cannot be eliminated entirely but that they can be overwritten.  By overwriting a bad habit, that bad habit is turned into a good pattern or a good routine.  As an example, when a bad habit has overtaken a life, it isn’t generally something that will be easily changed/eliminated — so if there’s a desire to change that bad habit, it’s necessary to line up solutions or new patterns along with some sort of reward for sticking to the new pattern.

    I’ve found it so hard to lose weight… or, actually, to lose weight and keep it off.  It’s not a matter of will power when I’ve been able to accomplish the goal of weightloss, it’s a matter of fueling that depletable resource or setting up solutions for pitfalls.  Continuing on with the consideration of weightloss as an example, I remove the trappings or pitfalls and I fill those spaces with healthful alternatives and activities.  For example, I might have cut vegetables on the counter for snacking, cold fresh fruit in the fridge, cold lemon water in a pitcher.  I have found that if I let myself compromise, the next compromises will come sooner and heavier than each before.  A little phrase I’ve brought to mind over and over:  Make no provision for the flesh… make right provision for the flesh.  I take away or don’t go where my fleshly desires tend to wander and because I know where my flesh tends to wander, I make provision for such times.

    This principle works on so many levels.  From ways I’m spending my time, to computer use, to thought patterns, to responses, to scheduling… I need to continue repatterning… repatterning… repatterning.  I need to do this over and over and over again until I overwrite bad habits (or when beginning new ones).  Amazingly this repetition sincerely does become habit — part of the fabric of my life.  As an aside, to be very candid, I feel so weary when I’ve recognized that I’ve wandered from the path that had become such a good pattern.    When I fall… and fall back into that bad habit, thought pattern, etc., etc., I’ve learned that I must continually resort to the Lord, to the patterns He set before me.  I recognize sooner, repent sooner and more quickly request and renew my strength in Him.

    The most important thing for me to remember is that I must patiently hope in the Lord and not be discouraged when I don’t see overnight change in my life.  I must see that day by day, in faith, He is changing me.

    It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the LORD.
    Lamentations 3.26
    But if we hope for that we see not, then do we with patience wait for it.
    Romans 8.25

    Love every day

    For the month of October (and surely, I pray, beyond) I’m determined to love every day.  Now, that could read: I’m determined to love every day or  I’m determined to love every day. I’m conscious of this double meaning or double intent and, therefore, have decided to aim to graciously pass through/live in/focus on living each day of this month on purpose.   I had come across an article, then a book and then a radio program (surely not be accident — and by the third time I could see this) keying in on the phrase: Love is a choice.  For surely, it is true, love — or the response of love/to love is a choice! We can let come what may, speak before we think, judge a matter before we consider it, respond without thinking.  Any or all of those reactions happen every day to us – in us – through us.  But the decision to love — the decision to react in love – the decision to embrace the day/season/month — just might prove to be more challenging with the sun’s rising and setting each day.

    One of the several things I’m doing/planning to do during this month is to pray each morning for specific needs that actually require more love than any other tangible thing. Another way I am planning on utilizing is to see or to watch for what the Lord has for each day by going to the Scriptures to search in the tenth chapter of a book (books of the Bible in no particular order) and the corresponding verse of the day.  So, today for example, I took a look at Hebrews 10.2.  I’ll choose the third verse in a different book tomorrow… the fourth verse in a different book the next day and so on.  October being the tenth month and using the calendar number for each day of the month gives me a great framework.

    Getting back to basics… doing the things we used to do… making soup! bread! soap! and other good things… lighting candles, singing together as a family, working on projects.  There truly are so many good things to do there’s no reason to mourn the passing of summer and all that means and fret at the entrance of the next season and all its marvelous possibilities.

    There’s a reason for this decision and resulting exercises… and if you have difficulty with changing seasons, low light, cold temps, family changes, etc., etc., you already have an idea what I’m talking about and can easily see why it’s so imperative, so necessary to embrace the day, to take every thought captive, to be renewed daily in the spirit of your mind and to give no place to the devil.  I can look back and sincerely say: an idle mind is surely his workshop and a failure to plan is a sure plan to fail.

    May the Lord bless you every day of October… and beyond.

    ed, note… this letter was saved in drafts and now today’s the 16th [I so needed this today] :

    And He took them up in His arms,
    put His hands upon them and blessed them.
    –Mark 10.16

    A Well Stocked Pantry and a PPP List

    You might consider taking a good look into your pantry… what you’ve got on hand, what do you use most often and what’s lacking?

    Then, if you have them, take a look at your most recent grocery receipts – most stores give enough description for you to cipher what’s on the receipt.   This is probably the easiest way to start a food pantry shopping/stock list.   A well stocked pantry is invaluable for many reasons — not only does it save you a great deal on so many levels,  you also have many more options for mealtimes, unplanned extra dinner guests and a “rainy day” stash.    So, stocking a pantry really makes ¢ents bcz good planning really will save you time and money.   Now, you may already do this, and if so, you know what I mean.  But, on the other hand, but if you haven’t done this, or don’t have much experience or incentive to do so, maybe I can encourage you a little bit, prod you along a little bit — it’s really easy to get started and to build little by little here and there  — you’ll be pleasantly surprised how easy this is (and how glad you’ll be to have it underway).  It’s sort of like another idea I’ve shared from time to time regarding building a freezer meal reserve (by occasionally doubling or tripling recipes: serving one and freezing one or two).  As you’re able, whenever you grocery shop, buy an additional item or a few additional items.  With this in mind each time, you’ll be shopping more wisely as you’ll be more apt to shop from a prepared list.  Occasionally you might plan to buy two of each item: storing one, using one.

    Now, the quantities of the foods in your pantry will be entirely up to you and to your family’s needs.  Stored in large glass jars or Food-Saver bags or Seal-a-Meal bags and/or other food storage containers (of course, commercially packaged or canned goods will have a longer shelf life, for the most part).  Any or all on the following list (use it as a springboard to make your own!) — depending on your family food preferences and other dietary needs and what you/they really do like and really will eat.  It’s foolish to simply stock up on what lasts longest or stores best if you/your family will not actually like or eat it… and you’ll regret it. This is not a TEOTWAWKI (the-end-of-the-world-as-we-know-it) list — it’s a “consider the ant” list, it’s a prepared mother’s prudently planned pantry list.  Thus, when you shop, think: PPP :o)

    • Water
    • Rice, Quinoa, Couscous, Assorted dry beans (navy, pinto, kidney, black, red, pink, garbanzo), Lentils, Assorted noodles – pasta (think of a variety your family likes)
    • Tomatoes (sauce, whole, stewed, pureed, diced)
    • Chicken, Vegetable, Beef, Tomato stock (home canned or purchased)
    • Canned meat – tuna, salmon, beef, chicken chili, turkey (home canned or purchased)
    • Canned sauce (home-canned or grocery) Spaghetti, hollandaise, marinara, flavoured oils
    • Canned vegetables, pumpkin, peas, navy beans, chili beans, black beans, pintos (I don’t store too many canned beans since we have all these in dry form — saves space, etc).
    • Additional canned items such as olives, water chestnuts, artichoke hearts, capers, peppers, chiles, etc.
    • Canned fruits (home-canned or grocery) peaches, pears, plums, applesauce, pineapple, etc.
    • Seasonings, Sea salt, Pepper, Assorted spices — (consider what you most commonly use in your recipes) cinnamon, cayenne, curry, garlic salt, dehydrated onion and garlic, etc., etc.
    • Sauces, hot sauce, salsa, ketchup, mustard, pickles, mayonnaise
    • Vanilla, Almond, Peppermint, Lemon, Maple extracts
    • Honey, Agave nectar
    • Olive Oil, Vegetable Oil, Coconut oil, Shortening,  Balsamic Vinegar, White Vinegar
    • Powdered milk, buttermilk, evaporated milk
    • Jelly and Jam — so easy to make
    • Cereals (package well for freshness) oatmeal, farina, rice
    • Dried fruits, fruit leather, raisins, chocolate chips, coconut, Jell-o, pudding mix
    • Baking Cupboard supplies:  Wheat berries (if you have a grinder — highly recommended), flour, cornmeal (rotate often), sugar, baking soda, baking powder, cornstarch, condensed milk, raw sugar, golden and dark brown sugar, powdered sugar, condensed milk (sweetened and unsweetened), molasses, sorghum, corn syrup, gelatin, tapioca
    • Peanut butter, Almond butter, Nutella (be sure to rotate these often)
    • Nuts and seeds — also rotate frequently as these tend to spoil more rapidly due to the oil content.
    • Coffee, teas, hot-chocolate mix
    • Paper products, towels, napkins, plastic bags, wraps, foil, etc.

      • Keep the shelves wiped down, the jars and containers clean so that you don’t attract pests (and this gives you an opportunity to examine your ‘stock’ from time to time.

      Then… be sure to have some very basic items on hand:

    • Well stocked first aid kit:  Aspirin, tylenol, Grapefruit-seed extract, Garlic extract, Alcohol, Hydrogen peroxide, swabs, gauze, bandaids, teatree oil, soap, tweezers, cotton, bandages — this list could include many more items, tinctures, etc.
    • Prescriptions, baking soda, apple-cider vinegar
    • Personal toiletries, toothpaste, deodorant, etc., toilet paper, fem products as needed, essential oils.
    • Basic cleaning: Soap, Vinegar, Baking Soda, Ammonia, Bleach, scrub-brush bucket
    • Matches, Kerosene for Oil Lamps (remember wicks), Flashlights/batteries, candles, lightbulbs
    • firewood, kettle, water, propane (if you have a campstove)
    • blankets/tent

    a gardener’s journal

    May I suggest….

    A gardener’s journal… or a summer log… a season’s log…

    I’m making one of these so that I can keep a running log of what’s going on in the garden — and what’s *supposed* to be going on ~wink~ in the garden.

    As an example… my entries are including what’s being picked now, what I need to do as far as clean-up, storage, etc., etc.  I’m dividing a simple notebook into sections — a section for an overview of our yard/garden (what’s planted where) and a basic timeline for maintenance.  In this way, I can see when something was planted, if it’s in an optimal place, when it was fertilized and when it will need to be done again.

    It also alerts me to what needs to be pruned this autumn and what can wait for springtime — I think I’ll make a note of the results of prior year’s pruning — especially if we made significant changes or did more drastic cutting.

    As I make a note of vine fruits or tree fruits and their initial ripening date or length of harvest, I can better plan for food preservation — as an example, I can note when we first pick the strawberries or raspberries, when the black berries were ready and when the Italian prunes will be ready.  As I see the squirrels gathering and running off with the hazelnuts, I’ve made a note of the date and in this way, I can better plan for getting the buckets ready and the nuts picked up.  Since this is not a new activity to me and I’ve never really taken the harvest all that seriously, I’ve always just watched for the squirrels — but now I’m thinking it’d be wise to be a better steward of these trees and so,  having the log will help me to keep better track of harvest dates.  Who knows? I just might start keeping track of just how many buckets of walnuts and hazelnuts we actually gather.  Until now, the amount has been generally quantified:  a bunch or a whole bunch.  We’ve tended to figure them in terms of prior years — more than last year or not as many as last year.   While that seems to have been sufficient, I’d still like to have a better idea so that I can measure how well the different pruning styles have affected or will affect the next season’s yield.

    I think that one of the most important reasons I want to maintain this gardener’s journal is so that I will be more accountable or more responsible with the bounty I’ve been given.  I read something some time ago… a mother talking with her daughter describing someone’s character and it went something like this: ” they’re the kind of people who let blackberries die on the vine.”  Now that may not seem like all that big a deal — perhaps unimportant, really, but I read that with some measure of conviction bcz I’ve allowed blackberries and many, many other things to just die on the vine.  I don’t want to be the kind of woman who lets fruit die on the vine.  I don’t want to waste opportunities or waste what I’ve been given.  Wasted seasons… the fruit of a season dying on the vine.  God gave me a great blessing as I let that mother’s comment sink down in my ears… to my shame, I remember many seasons where fruit was left on the vine to fall to the ground.  And, so… in light of this, in light of God’s great love, grace,  mercy and kindness, I endeavour to, from this day, so far as it depends on me, to be careful with what He’s given me to tend.

    Has God given me fruit, a harvest, a bounty… that I’ve let die on the vine?  What can I learn and change?  Have I been careful with what He’s allowed me to grow?  Have I cultivated, pruned, watered, weeded and tended well to the garden the Lord has given me?  What can I do today?  How can I best plan for and invest in this and the coming season?  I repent, I rejoice, I seek and find my answers in the Master Gardener’s Journal and I take another step today…