Joy and Sorrow

The older I get, the more I see it: the look — the longing look in a mother’s eyes when things didn’t turn out like she hoped.  It’s not necessarily disappointment or despair or even bitterness — it’s just sort of: sorrow.   There’s another look, too — it’s the hopeful look in a mother’s eyes at the mention of one of her children, a memory or an event from days gone by… it’s joy.  Joy is in her eyes.

Well, that’s what I’ve come to think motherhood’s all about:  joys and sorrows.  Motherhood is a call to sorrow; Motherhood’s a call to joy.  Truly, sorrow skips no home — but joy — joy’s not far behind, either.

Throughout these many years of motherhood, I look back and see the braided events… the joy, the sorrow — and the Lord.  I know I’ve got sorrow in my eyes — but I’ve got joy in my eyes, too.  All around me is the braid: the cords of joy and sorrow.  It’s as if He’s just been holding the whole braid together — for, were it not for Him, the joy and sorrow would just be a tangled, knotted twist — but somehow — marvelously — He’s the central strong cord that’s made it a long braid: a long braid of years — a long braid of joys and sorrows intermingled with His cord of grace and mercy lovingly held in His gracious hands.

I suppose He could’ve prevented or not allowed some of the sorrows — but I so needed them, for without them I’d not have appreciated or understood the deepness of joy.  And, I suppose He could have withheld some of the joys — but without them I wonder if I’d not have been able to accept or endure the sorrows.  Without the sorrows I’d still be going along unrepentant, unchanged, unrestored.  Without the joys I’d be weary, weak and probably feel without hope.  He could have done many things differently. He could have given or withheld.

But He didn’t.
And I’m glad.

In His great wisdom and merciful kindness, He allowed a blending of the two — and as I’ve experienced the reality that He’s the one with the cords in His loving Hands I see more and more how surely I have needed both.  But I forget that sometimes.  I wonder: how will a situation be resolved?  I fret: _________ will never be different than it is today.  I weep: how will this son or daughter make it?  I cry to Him: what will the end of all of this be?  I laugh with joy and ask Him:  how could I possibly be this blessed?  I smile and exclaim to Him: how could I be so fortunate to have the life I have or the family or the health or strength I have today or  have had all these years?   All the while all of these facets of the cords of joy and sorrow are gently (though sometimes it feels anything but gently) turning in His hands gently twisting, braiding, blending, strengthening the braid.

Sorrow’s right around the corner.
Joy’s right down the path…
I need them both.

Doing a new thing

Based on past performance, many of us can attest that doing a new thing is hard.   This is where some of us fall off the cliff — or don’t even try!  It takes determination to not allow past performance to thwart us from trying or doing a new thing!

Doing a new thing is tough.  Especially when that new thing takes will power or money — few of us have much of either.  And,  as we age, we have this daunting fear that past results (things that were good before they stopped being good) don’t necessarily mean that today’s performance will yield the same success results.  :o(

I think the devil delights in our doubts as much a he delights in our failings… surely he does when we doubt God or doubt our faith.  But he also delights in sabotaging our efforts seek the Lord and to do good.  Sometimes he’s successful at both.  We mustn’t doubt for a moment that we do have an enemy that hates for us to yield to God, hates for us to seek the Lord — especially seeking the Lord early – hates for us to be faithful to the calling of the Lord in our lives.

I say this because I want to suggest that any attempt to do good or to do a new thing must be bathed in prayer and executed with the blessing of the Lord.  I think failing these two things is what ultimately leads to our failure in doing that new thing — and, certainly, doing it well.

Take daily Bible reading or early rising or prayer or fasting, for example,  if we attempt any in our own strength,  we’ll fail — but, we know from Scripture,  when we commit to seeking the Lord — His will and His righteousness, He will work in and through us — even though it may not look to us (at the time) to be working!

Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in Him;
and He shall bring it to pass.” -Psalm 37.5

So, as we launch out into the vast expanse of this unblemished year, this uncharted territory, we can be assured that the Lord is already here and He does, indeed, have a marvelous plan for each of us.  And all the things that face us, all the trials and temptations, all the joys and sorrows, all the successes and failures do not — will not — escape His gaze.  He is already there.

Then thine ears shall hear a word behind thee, saying,
This is the way, walk ye in it, that ye not turn to the right hand
and that ye not turn to the left hand.  -Isaiah 30.21

As we seek to do a new thing, we must first seek His face, take His hand and and wait! and see! if that’s where He wants to lead us.  I truly see Him doing a new thing… I want to follow Him in it… this is the first day of all our tomorrows…  O, may we do a new thing… in faith!

Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth;
shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness,
and rivers in the desert. -Isaiah 43.19

This Could Be…

As I read year-end letters, more Christmas cards and letters, headlines and articles, a common theme is always revisited this time of year — sure as New Year’s resolutions, are the slogans and affirmations: Out with the old, in with the New! This Year’s the Year for You!  The sentiments may have very different motivation, very different context, but the intent is the same: This year’s going to be the best year ever!

And they always are.  Today.

Today is the first day of the New Year… clean, fresh slate, an unmarked calendar, a new dawn, a bright new day unmarred by the oft repeated sins of our youth.  We may look back at previous years and see the failings that trip us up, the habits that chain us, the bitterness that superglues us to the past — but somehow, today, we have before us a new year with all the possibilities and none of the failures of the year that’s just passed by.  Every thing we ever wanted to do – to be – to say – to think: we can now plan (again) to do because THIS is going to be the best year ever.

And, you know… this could be.  This could be the best year ever.  This could be the year to crown all years.  It will all depend on what we say and do and think in response to all the God says and does and thinks toward us.  This could be the best year of our lives and not at all for all the reasons we might imagine. This could be the best year of our lives because of what God is doing in and through us or will do in and through us.

As you look back on the year that’s just passed, the year that’s so last year… Count your blessings, name them one by one… count your many blessings see what God has done.

This could be the year for you. I pray as I write this, that this will, indeed, be the year for you — and I pray all of these things for myself and my family, too, by the way — whenever I write “you” — I mean: me, too.  ♥

I pray this will be the year you see the loving kindness of the Lord.  I pray this will be the year you will take His hand and leave your hand in His.  I pray this will be the year you will trust Him, follow Him, obey Him, love Him, yield your self to Him and His leading.  I pray this will be the year you lay down your life, quit trying to go it alone — that you let go of all those things that bind you and lay them at the foot of the Cross.  I pray you will finish well —  this will be the year you will have been found faithful.

Could this be the year for you?

Crowned with Goodness

May the Lord, indeed, crown your year with goodness ♥ and may the coming year be your most blessed year in the Lord.

 


Praise waiteth for thee, O God, in Sion: and unto thee shall the vow be performed.
2  O thou that hearest prayer, unto thee shall all flesh come.
3  Iniquities prevail against me: as for our transgressions, thou shalt purge them away.
4  Blessed is the man whom thou choosest, and causest to approach unto thee, that he may dwell in thy courts: we shall be satisfied with the goodness of thy house, even of thy holy temple.
5  By terrible things in righteousness wilt thou answer us, O God of our salvation; who art the confidence of all the ends of the earth, and of them that are afar off upon the sea:
6   Which by his strength setteth fast the mountains; being girded with power:
7  Which stilleth the noise of the seas, the noise of their waves, and the tumult of the people.
8  They also that dwell in the uttermost parts are afraid at thy tokens: thou makest the outgoings of the morning and evening to rejoice.
9  Thou visitest the earth, and waterest it: thou greatly enrichest it with the river of God, which is full of water: thou preparest them corn, when thou hast so provided for it.
10  Thou waterest the ridges thereof abundantly: thou settlest the furrows thereof: thou makest it soft with showers: thou blessest the springing thereof.
11  Thou crownest the year with thy goodness; and thy paths drop fatness.
12  They drop upon the pastures of the wilderness: and the little hills rejoice on every side.
13  The pastures are clothed with flocks; the valleys also are covered over with corn; they shout for joy, they also sing.
——Psalm 65

Another Year Is Dawning

Another Year Is Dawning
Lyrics ~ Frances R. Havergal, 1836 -1879
Music ~ Samuel S. Wesley, 1810 – 1876

Another year is dawning!
Dear Father, let it be,
In working or in waiting,
Another year with Thee;
Another year of leaning
Upon Thy loving breast;
Another year of trusting,
Of quiet, happy rest;

Another year of mercies,
Of faithfulness and grace;
Another year of gladness
In the shining of Thy face;
Another year of progress,
Another year of praise;
Another year of proving
Thy presence all the days;

Another year of service,
Of witness for Thy love;
Another year of training
For holier work above.
Another year is dawning!
Dear Father, let it be
On earth, or else in heaven,
Another year for Thee.

 

 

It’s the week before Christmas and…

It’s the week before Christmas and all through the house, mother is ____________ and the family feels ___________.

I posted this @ Welcome Home on Facebook… but it’s so important that I thought I’d share it here.  I’ve been posting brief year-end countdown thoughts on Facebook @ Welcome Home.  In the new year I hope to post daily home notes and verses for encouragement.

More housekeeping and sorting today. Don’t be afraid to box up stuff you really don’t use — as you’re cleaning and preparing for festive dinners and/or visits from family & friends. Whatever you box up today, just set it aside and after the first of the year, you can decide if you really wanted to part with it or not. As you work in the kitchen, do some cleaning as you go. If you get seldom used items out, wipe the cabinet before putting things away.”
If you haven’t ironed your table linens, do it today, hang the ironed cloths in your closet — first hand a thick a towel over the hanger and put your cloth on the hanger — less creasing this way. If you still need tea-lights or candles — be sure to add them to your shopping list.  

Minimize your steps and trips… you’ll get more done in less time with careful planning and —-minimizing — without apology!— at this point.

And… really… do yourself a favour: If you haven’t gotten things done by now, you probably won’t get “big” things done — forget it…. really. Cross those things *off* your list. Concentrate instead on doing nice things with your family — it’s not worth it to you — or to them — to stress about not getting all those big things done. Believe me… a couple of nice, fun things are *much* better than a bunch of regrets and apologies for not getting all the big things and plans done – or done poorly.

As I have written for years: Mamas, be sweet to your family. They need you — and I will say again and again… they may not remember all the stuff you did, but they’ll remember how it felt at home and how you loved them.

Trust me… a fretful mother, a distracted mother, an always sorry mother is tough to be around — if you’ve talked candidly with your children and have sought to be ‘right’ with them, they’ll tell you these things. You’ll be surprised how loving, forgiving, supportive they’ll be with you as they experience your daily desire/effort to be a godly woman and joyfilled mother.

Join me in working at attending to the best things… and being a loving/loveable mother… a mother worthy of all the cards. ♥ ”

The Vacant Chair

I’ve entitled this blog entry The Vacant Chair — a title that’s not original with me, but the title of a poem I’ll add to this post in a moment.  The poem was written by a dear saint, the husband of a precious friend who passed into heaven earlier this year.

It’s interesting that the poem should come in the  mail today… as I have been thinking of several different ones who have ‘vacant chairs’ at their tables again this year.  I think of the mothers and fathers who stand at the glass watching for the wayward son or daughter, hoping he or she will be home to occupy his or her chair at the table this year.  I think of the families who won’t have a baby to hold, a parent to care for, a friend to visit at Christmastime… more empty chairs.  I think of friends who have a vacant womb — bruised heart this Christmastime.

I think of families who will visit and look into the vacant, dim eyes of loved ones with vacant minds — long ago leaving vacant chairs.  I think of couples with vacant chairs of children they never bore or only hold in their hearts. I think of those whose choices keep them afar off — who’ll not be home again this year — vacant chairs.  I think of those whose husbands are off fighting in a war they never wanted to fight — the family tables with a vacant chair again this year.  I think of friends or family who’ve moved away and they’ll miss sitting in the chairs around a familiar table this year.  I think of mothers and dads who’ve married off a son or daughter this past year — a sweet sadness may wash over them — as they set tables with fewer chairs.  And there are innumerable other scenarios… innumerable empty chairs.  Vacant chairs will tell many stories… some, only in the heart.

The Vacant Chair was written by a loving, faithful husband whose eyes are growing dim, but whose memory is sweet and keen: for a wife who lived such a remarkable, long, full life — occupying the chair beside him for some sixty-seven years.

VACANT CHAIR

I love you dear with all my heart,
True love was ours to share,
God has called you to His Home,
I’m left with a vacant chair.

I think of things I’ve done today,
My toil and my care;
I praise the Lord you’re free from pain,
But I’m left with a vacant chair.

The day will come, I’ll join you there,
In Heaven, bright and fair,
We’ll praise the Lord, with all our heart,
And there’ll be no vacant chair!

Paul R Turnidge

From Paul’s Christmas letter, I’ll leave you with this very encouraging thought:

God has shown Himself wonderful to me. Every day I am amazed how He directs my path. Sometimes I look through my windshield of life and wonder where I’m going, then I look in the rear view mirror and see how far I have gone,  and amazingly exclaim, “Surely the Lord has led me.””

Christmas Letters

I love receiving Christmas letters each year — I read them — some, many times. I read them to the family and take the enclosed photos and hang them on our kitchen cabinet doors.  I love the letters for so many reasons — maybe for as many different reasons as the number of letters received each year.

I often wonder how many drafts some writers attempted before the resulting letter was complete.  I say this because I attempted to write our Christmas letter no less than a dozen times this year.  Each draft wordier (no surprise there!) than the previous — then I’d write a rather perfunctory letter — and it sounded like it. Then I wrote intending to add photo highlights. But then I thought of all the things I wouldn’t have space to include.  After each sort of attempt — some, far along in the process:  I think, no… no, that’s not it.  Click: Ctrl A.   Click: Delete.  Computer lid: click.   Lights out: click.

Maybe tomorrow, I’d ponder as I drifted off to sleep… maybe tomorrow… maybe tomorrow I will write in such a manner as to concisely convey,  in less than a thousand words,  the story of a year in the life of a family.  All I could see was the hand of the Lord over two extremely thankful parents in rocking chairs: observing the marvelous lives of nine very busy adult children living at home and more beyond.

And so, more treasured letters and cards have arrived… more beautiful photos are on the cabinet doors… more tears of joy have been shed for the changes and blessings and losses and accomplishments the Lord has given family and friends.  Melancholy tears of joy… and the passage of time.

The Christmas letter is finished.  It’s even been printed.  And it’s incomplete to convey all the things I wish I could’ve written, because there’s so much more the Lord has done and taught us this past year than time or space allowed.  But… I’m glad we have something to send and a photo to put with it.  I’m really grateful it mattered enough to enough of our family here to push to do what I know I’ll be glad we did.

♥