March 2009 – Page 2 – The Welcome Home

30 Favourite Things #17

Wow… now my mind’s just clicking along reviewing favourite memories from my fiftieth year. Ordinary days, ordinary things, ordinary experiences. Somehow, when seen through new eyes, things really take on new meaning or have a greater value. For example, because of the deaths of a number of people in the last year, I’ve taken to looking at events in a whole new light. Or, rather, I now understand quite a bit better, my daddy’s comment at a Thanksgiving dinner table many, many years ago. He said, in part, “look around at this table, look at the faces… the next time we’re all together, it won’t look this way — maybe some will be missing, others will look older… this table will never look this way again…” and so on.

I attempted to remember that when our family hosted our annual backyard party. As the cars and vans began to drive down the lane and the friends began to gather, I thought back on the different years — the many years all these friends have gathered. And yet– and yet, again this year, the crowd didn’t look just the same. For it was truly was a different crowd — some old friends, some new, some older, many changes, some were missing. The crowd was different bcz time had passed, events had happened — births and deaths, trials and successes, gains and losses — much had transpired in each family over the previous year. I stood on our back porch step and looked out at the crowd — some, I’ve now known for decades… some, I had just met that night.

Every year it’s amazing to experience the sweet friendships — budding friendships — old friends and new. And that’s why we do it… and that’s why we look forward to it.

I remembered what my daddy had said so long ago — and were he to have lived to see these days, he’d likely still be saying the same thing. Well, on that day I tried to make a mental image I wouldn’t forget. I try to remember it all, even now, as I write this. Funny thing is, just glancing at the crowd pictured below I think of many changes [even since I began to write this entry a few days ago!] in their lives or things have already changed in the last several months — and will some more — maybe a lot more — before the next annual backyard party coming up in July.

klahayadaysbackyardparty klahayadaysbackyardparty2

30 Favourite Things #16

Birthdays! Birthdays! Birthdays! These were favourite things from my fiftieth year. I’m not sure just which birthday stood out the most over this past year. But one birthday I was *so* extraordinarily happy to celebrate was my husband’s birthday. As I look back I marvel at the goodness and mercy of the LORD and truly, I was/am so thankful the LORD gave him another birthday and I pray for many more. Wes’s birthday was one day shy of one year since he had a heart attack. I recall thinking in the ICCU surgery waiting room: Lord, will he have any more birthdays — was yesterday’s birthday the last? And now more time has passed… and I do praise the LORD for every day.

Well, many happy birthdays were celebrated. A couple were celebrated without the ‘birthday boy’ or ‘birthday girl’ present. Both Kathryn and Timothy were in Africa (and Timothy just had his second birthday celebration the last baby turned 7 and the first baby turned 29. In between were all the other wonderful birthdays of our own children (and many other wonderful birthdays as well!!) — 10, 12, 13, 15, 17, 18, 20, 22, 27… which actually means that some of those have already or will shortly be one higher. Again, I marvel: I never thought I would be this old (and feel this young!!). Truly, no kidding around, I marvel that my ‘baby’ will soon be thirty — bcz I find myself thinking: didn’t *I* just turn thirty!?! I mean it sort of seems like it was recent – I know, I know.. it was soooo long ago that I simply cannot remember it.

So, anyway, now I find I further understand people’s comments such as: age is a state of mind or you’re as young as you feel or you’re only as old as you feel, or I’m not getting old, I’m getting better, or whatever. I know I probably used to think those comments were sort of silly, I’m sure. I probably thought they were the sort of “positive mental attitude” stuff that “old people” say to console themselves — you know, that condescending attitude ~~most~~ many young people have toward anyone 20 years older than themselves.

Okay. I repent. I wish I had known then what I know now.

I don’t feel old. I do feel better. I know I’m not as young as I was — but I sure don’t feel older. But I do have to admit: when I stop and attempt to recount but a few hundred of the thousands of things that have happened — well, my goodness, I’ve got to be older! I marvel at how much has occurred, how many things we’ve done in such a short time!! I’m sure glad I got to live this long. Wow. What if it’s double this?!??!!!!!

So I resolve not to listen to young people’s ignorant comments and respond in kind. I want to grow older gracefully. I hope I’ll remember how these days feel and how those days felt. I don’t want to become an impatient, bitter, crotchety old woman waving my cane at the little whippersnappers and yelling: just wait, your time’s coming!

a sign of these pitiful times

30 Favourite Things #15

A big garden. I’m so thankful that our neighbours wanted to make it a joint effort to have a big garden. And a bigger garden we had, that’s for certain!! It was really quite a big deal to keep that garden weeded, watered and planted and replanted and replanted. Things grew, things died. Things looked beautiful, things looked horrible. O, all the replanting? Well, for some reason or another, several things either didn’t grow well or grew so well that the bugs loved them – thus the replanting of several things – several times.

We were trying to go all organic. But somewhere along the way, in a few places we abandoned fighting with organic resources and headed to off war armed with some chemicals. And, by the way, I did that with my roses, too. I decided the kinder, gentler way was just not going to work this year and so I went to the Co-op and got some Ortho Rose spray…. and voilà! the pesky aphids and molds went away.

That big garden was a whole bunch of hard work — but it was great for so many reasons. I think one of the most profitable aspects of that garden — and any garden, for that matter, is the great benefit of studied quiet. It takes a lot of time to do a lot of work — or a lot of weeding — and both are pretty incredible incentives to think on Scripture. So, it’s probably one of the most important activities I spend time doing each day — kind of a quiet time, study time, praise and worship time all rolled into one. O, the sermons that come from the garden. How instructive are the plants and weeds… the soil, seeds and water. How inspirational is the diligent work.

I loved that it was sunny a lot. I loved that the garden was hard work and the days were sometimes exhausting. I loved that we got sunburned. I love that we got so dirty. I love that we had water fights. I love that we learned about so much stuff that didn’t work very well. I love that the children were always working alongside us and we all had the great satisfaction when something did work out real well!

I’m glad we planted a lot of corn. A few times. I’m glad we planted lots of beans, potatoes, tomatoes, carrots, onions, squash, green beans, lettuce — and flowers! — I’m so thankful our friend had presence of mind to plant a bunch of flowers at the ends of each row! Isn’t that sweet?!?! I am really looking forward to that aspect!!

You know what we didn’t plant enough of? Yes! Zucchini! Ha! ‘Bet you never heard any gardener say that!! 🙂

So… we have the seeds, we have the dreams, we have the enthusiasm and we have the garden tilled. All we need now is patience to wait for the sunny days!!

30 Favourite Things #14

Another thing among thirty favourite things from my fiftieth year: Facebook! I love Facebook! And, this, from someone who was/is so adamantely opposed to MySpace. Adamantly opposed. As for Facebook “safeguards” — I have opted for the “no ads” on the sidebar and I don’t add many “applications” and don’t add people I don’t know — but it’s totally not an “anonymous” atmosphere. There’s no real anonymity on Facebook. A “safeguard” I have to personally adhere to is: I’ve got to be *very* careful to watch the clock and not spend too much time browsing Facebook! Warning: It. is. a. time. vacuum!

I first opened a Facebook account when Kathryn was in Uganda a couple of years ago. It was a very simple way for us to communicate as the internet connection wasn’t always reliable and leaving notes for her there was a quick and simple process for her to use when internet time was at a premium. We also benefitted as a family bcz we could see “her life” and feel like we were in close touch.

Well, such has been the case over the last year for Timothy in Ghana and for when Kathryn went back to Uganda. In addition to writing notes to them (and our other children), which I try to do each day, I’m able to see photos they post or comments from others that are soooo encouraging to me. It’s such a blessing to my heart to see the many who are praying right alongside me in many places. It’s been sweet to read the notes and see all the loving encouragement — I cannot adequately express my gratitude for the tremendous support our children have or have had! How lavish the Lord has been to give us a glimpse of His care — and to show us, often in photographs, what He’s doing in remote places! We sure see it — and, more importantly, Timothy sees it — the encouragement Kathryn saw before, during and after her mission’s trips.

Another unforeseen benefit has been the great blessing of reuniting with old — and I do mean old!! ;o) — friends. I wonder if I would have ever sought out some of the old friends I have been able to reconnect with. Interestingly, it’s like the Lord is answering questions for me… or giving me answers to questions I never thought to ask — sort of showing me (as Paul Harvey might say) the reeeeeeest. of. the. story.

It’s been refreshing, encouraging, and instructive to me on so many levels. There are downsides — yes, there are downsides to Facebook. Just like there are downsides to the whole Internet — and I’m not even referring to the obvious potentials for internet sewage to be pumped into homes across the world. I’m referring simply to the downsides of too much time reading “good things” and other downsides to websites… our website… to blogs… to this blog. But there is good — there’s potential for a whole lotta good — when discretion is applied.

So, especially during my fiftieth year… it’s sure been fun to see old faces. The reflection in the mirror is not alone. :o)

Facebook. Don’t say I recommended you ought to get an account. I’m just sayin.

30 Favourite Things #13

Another favourite memory of my fiftieth year was going to the movie Fireproof! For a bit, the movie was blazing like a wild fire. Though I still don’t have the Love Dare Journal, one of our daughters did buy the DVD of the movie. It really is a great movie I’m so glad to have seen — and I’m so thankful — for many reasons — to have been able to go see the movie in the theater. The first time was with Wes and then again with a couple of our older children; and, if I could, I’d go see it again tonight — yes, I loved it that much — and it meant that much to me.

You know why it means so much to me? It’s so meaningful or so significant to me because I love the Lord — I love His marvelous plan for marriage — I love that HE was at the center of this movie and I love that the gospel was clearly presented in an age when people are trying to make the gospel or salvation real easy and real common.

If the gospel or salvation was real easy and real common, then Jesus wouldn’t have paid the great price He paid and God’s perfect standard would be pretty casual — even petty. But the price Jesus paid was anything but casual and light — it truly was beyond description. God’s perfect will and standard can be met by no man for all have sinned and come short of the glory of God.– it’s only through faith in Jesus Christ and His atoning death and resurrection that we can come before the Holy Lord God — receive forgiveness of sins and life eternal. Men leading huge ‘congregations’ in mega ‘churches’ all over the world aren’t telling the whole truth and people are going to hell bcz they duped into believing a counterfeit — a false gospel — not the Truth of the Gospel of Jesus Christ the Lord.

I love that the movie, Fireproof, clearly presents the Truth of the Gospel of Jesus Christ — and makes no apology or excuse. How I love that!!

I marvel at how scripted life seems to be. I mean, for example, it was interesting to me that the characters in the movie, Caleb and Katherine would say things that I (and you, no doubt) have heard people say. I’m talking about people who are married – or, rather, people who are unhappily married. They all seem to say similar things – things like: s/he doesn’t understand me; s/he doesn’t listen to me; s/he doesn’t care about me; I’m not the same person I was when we got married… I never loved you… We’re not the same people anymore…. and on and on the similar comments go — on and on the script goes. The enemy has such common ways of deceiving people and feeding them lies.

But – Fireproof – or the methods presented in this movie can change lives — change directions of marriages. This movie – or the following of the ideas, principles, etc., etc. in this movie can — or I dare say — will change lives — will change marriages.

I love what’s happening bcz of this movie and His Word. The men and women who are taking a long hard look at where they’re at – the state of their lives, marriages, and homes. In this day of foolishness in our nation – in this day of evil and blasphemy — in this day of arrogance against God, I love that a movie was playing in “mainstream theaters” and people are being given the opportunity to see the Truth. Whew! Love it.

I love being married (but, I already told you that a bunch of times over the years). I love having been married a long time. I love hearing people’s great reactions to this movie — and I pray many, many more will see this movie, buy the DVD, buy the Love Dare Journal and begin the Love Dare and journey the path of restoring marriage, fortifying marriage, strengthening marriage or affirming marriage. Whatever needs to happen in each home, I pray the LORD will work on behalf of all whose hearts are turned to Him and turned to reading His Word and obeying the Lord in word and in deed. I pray men and women will be healed – that men and women will have freedom from addictions that are destroying their lives, their marriages, their homes. I pray many will turn to the LORD and be free from the bonds of sin and penalty of death and separation from God.

Here are some “Love Dare” sites and journaling blogs
The official Love Dare Journal
The 40 day Love Dare blog
Love Dare Journals – BH publishing

So… I’m so glad for the blessing of marriage… and so thankful to my husband… my dear companion all these years.

30 Favourite Things #12

Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord
and in the power of His might.
Put on the whole armour of God

that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.
For we wrestle not against flesh and blood,
but against principalities, against powers,
against the rulers of the darkness of this world,
against spiritual wickedness in high places.
Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God,
that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day,
and having done all, to stand.
Stand therefore,
having your loins girt about with truth,
and having on the breastplate of righteousness;
And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace;
Above all, taking the shield of faith,
wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.
And take the helmet of salvation,
and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God:
Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit,
and watching thereunto
with all perseverance and supplication
for all saints;
Ephesians 6.10-17

These verses have been a blessing to me in this past year as our son, Timothy – a missionary in Ghana, has been facing many oppositions from the enemy. Learning to trust God in adversity has been a blessing throughout my adult life and certainly I have come to see that had it not been the Lord who was *on my side* I would have been swallowed up in discouragement, fear and doubt. But God. But God has been merciful and of great comfort and strength for the day.

I know I can trust the Lord for whatever comes and that assurance is fortified each time we face a trial or a testing or sickness or loss or whatever. God is only good, only faithful. Learning more and more to trust the Lord with anything that concerns me has been such a blessing and has carried me through. So, that’s why I add — testings of faith — to the list of thirty things I am thankful for in my fiftieth year. (And I will write about some specific testings of faith in a bit)

Because of the faithful, merciful and perfect will of the Lord, I can truly and honestly say that I would rather have my boy in the Hand of the Lord anywhere in the world — than nearby wandering or outside the will of the Lord.

Safety is in the Hand of the Lord.

Today is Timothy’s Birthday – Blessed be the Name of the Lord.

30 Favourite Things #11

When I was a child, one of my most favourite activities was swimming. In Southern California – where I was born – the weather sort of necessitated some form of relief and for me, it was swimming. I recall numerous times where, as a grade-schooler, I would walk home for lunch and I’d either eat my lunch in the pool or I would at least sit in the pool for a few minutes before returning to school. We moved to another city and there I would walk to and from school each day and invariably walk straight into the pool after school. The weather from late spring through the fall was very, very hot.

Now, we don’t have today the sort of pool my parents had for the different homes in which we lived when I was a child, but we do have a swimming pool and our children have sure enjoyed it very much. As I was gardening last summer the thought came to me: am I never going to spend a summer afternoon swimming again? Am I never going to jump into that pool or swim or float in an inner-tube or wear a mask and fins and swim around snorkling? So, I decided that day to go swimming — much to the shock of my children (and my husband, too — though he knows I love swimming!), I just jumped in. Ahhhh… it was wonderful and such great fun and refreshment.

Sure, I was nervous and sure, I was sort of embarrassed and self conscious. But I reckoned that I was here at home in the privacy of our yard and had my dress right there by the pool and the swimming suit was passable for me — not the very best, but certainly not at all the worst. And so I went swimming. A number of times. I asked myself why I hadn’t done it sooner — especially when the younger children were so delighted and begged me to stay and play in the pool with them! It certainly made the day more fun (for them and me!) and the work more enjoyable with the reward of that cool water at the end! I couldn’t think of a reason not to!

This past year has held a lot of questions and activities like that, for there have been many times where I wondered why I ever stopped doing some things and never started doing others. I looked out at the yard today — the sun was shining brightly but it was very, very crisp and cold outside. I looked over the seeds in the beautiful seed packets and I began to consider where and how I’d plant the different seeds. I see the roses and other bushes and trees need the partially completed pruning to be finished.

I can almost feel the warmth of the sunshine as I sit near the woodstove’s blazing heat… and I can almost hear the children laughing and playing out there… and I can almost smell the Coppertone and the pool water.

So, if you haven’t done something you ~~used to~~ love to do and there’s even a remote possibility of doing it… don’t wait till you’re fifty!! Go do it!

30 Favourite Things #10

When I was a little girl I had a friend I played with nearly every day. Even when others thought they were too old to play with her – I still did. I was so loyal to her — rarely going anywhere without thinking of her and if I ought to bring her along. She was beautiful — so beautiful, in fact, that I found myself dreaming that one day I might look like her — charming as she was. She had fabulous clothes and shoes – beautiful hair and a perpetual smile. I sometimes wonder if all that time with her long ago sort of instilled in me different thought patterns I was oblivious to in those days. I wonder if I got part of my lack of confidence from her — part of my never being good enough or pretty enough — from her. Though we lived in a very nice home, I recall dreaming that I’d love to live in a house like hers and maybe even one day have a car like hers. Yes… she had a car — even though she’s only two weeks older than me, she had a car. O, the places we went — it was like a dream vacation when we’d take the car zooming around.

As I got older I began to see the downside of her life. I began to weigh things more carefully… choices became important and I realized that actions have consequences — ideas have consequences. As much as her appearance and lifestyle had early on appealed to me, I realized her lifestyle was so not one that I would want to emulate and I also realized her appearance and apparent behaviour was also not what I ever wanted for my life or for our daughters for that matter. And it was my family, my daughters and message of faith in the Lord that made me take a long look at the message that old friend was giving and instilling. I wanted more for them — even though she seemed to have everything — why, she had more than most people ever even dreamed of owning — come to think of it, she even had a dream house. Though in and of themselves those things aren’t wrong or evil, those things – those ways – aren’t what I wish for our daughters. I so want so much better for our daughters .

Well, my old treasured friend, Barbara Millicent Roberts went on to become very famous – the envy of million$. Actually, I’ve had opportunities to have her here in our home but long ago decided against it, knowing full well that it would be counterproductive. She’s just too much — on so many levels — she sets a standard and subtly engrains a mindset I’m not wanting for our daughters — an inappropriate message for a woman who’s seeking to live in accordance with the Word of God. It’s not that I am so archaic or so ideological or so anti-feminist (okay, I guess I pretty much am the latter).

When I see her I never think: wow, what purity, what beauty, what gentleness, what modesty — what virtue, what faith, what humility, what a virtuous woman or what an honourable mother she exemplifies and portrays! Her lifestyle, independence, careers, appearance, obsession with clothes, makeup, hair, jewelry, accessories and possessions is, again on so my levels, opposite what I’m seeking to instill in our daughters (and sons, too, by the way). Things we have in our home give a message– instill a mindset — form an ideology. An, my-o-my, what a responsibility we have as mothers of daughters!!

So… probably unpopular with some and with agreement from others, I’ve just not brought her home. But when March rolls around, I still think of her sometimes. I think of the many, many hours I spent with her and all her stuff. Come to think of it, maybe she spent time with you, too.

O, I know when you see her today you won’t believe Barbie’s 50! I know — Hard to believe we’re the same age… I thought that when we turned 20… and 30… and 40… and now?

So, is she a favourite thing from my 50th year? No. The reason she’s #10 on my list of some of the “life changing” or “significantly impacting things” from my 50th year is a realization or an affirmation, really. I realize that she (along with other things) symbolizes a lot of self-centeredness, foolishness, selfishness, emptiness — sort of the superfluity of naughtiness referred to in Romans 6 in my life. And so, at this half-century mark, I ask seriously, what fruit had I then in those things whereof I am now ashamed? I sorrowfully say: she symbolizes the life(s) I thought I wanted. I do not have what I thought I wanted. I have more than everything I ever longed for. Truly I am a princess.

More than ever before in my life I’m sort of taking inventory of what’s been good, what’s been foolish, what’s worth doing and what’s worth “thinking on.” If I live another day or another 50 years I don’t want to live with regrets over what I did, what I thought, what I wanted, where I went, what I spent my time doing. I never want to live a plastic life.

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.
Philippians 4.8

I am so humbled, so thankful, so in awe that the Lord saved me and is daily conforming me into His image. I am so grateful He loves me so much that He couldn’t leave me where I was or where I was going. I sing His praises more today than ever for giving me life and for life eternal by faith and salvation in Jesus my Lord and Saviour. I pray you have this wonderful assurance, too. He is the only thing that’s real.

30 Favourite Things #9

I love, love, love catering weddings and making wedding cakes and making things special for people I love. I sort of discovered that I’m an adrenaline junkie. I love the thrill of planning, purchasing, preparing and presenting food — any kind of food — for parties and weddings. I love hearing what people want to have served at their wedding. I love getting a glimpse of what they’re picturing for the day. I love picturing it myself — grasping it — and mentally preparing it and then I love telling them: Okay… we’ll do it!

It’s sort of like getting a kite, assembling it, going out on the perfect day and running and running like crazy and then looking back watching the beautiful kite take flight high in the sky… and once it’s up and steadily flying — I love just standing there a bit longer to take it all in. That’s what events are like to me. Run, run, run. Hurry, hurry, hurry. Go, go, go… and then — all of a sudden: It’s…….. showtime!!

We had the great honour of catering a wedding last June. It was both elaborate and complex in that we had to be absolutely certain to not miss a beat, not forget a morsel and not overlook a single detail. The wedding was not local — it was in another state, the location would be exceedingly remote and there were no conveniences nearby. So everything had to be carefully planned to the minutest detail. The van had to carry the food, the pans, the prep materials and *US!!* [note: Wes did go back to the nearest town the next day for the perishable foods — which was also part of the plan]

For example, the six – 5 gallon buckets of icecream had to be purchased at the last stop out of town. I had to be sure that three of them were iced and allow the other three to remain as cold as possible but also “thaw” a tiny bit over the hour+ drive to the site. The reason for that was that I would begin assembling the “Dairy-Queen” style Ice Cream Cakes as soon as we got there. That also meant that the six pans, the parchment, the filling and the plastic wrap also had to be very easily accessible. Because I had planned every hour of the two and half days before “showtime!” I knew just what we needed to do. I had gone over and over in my mind what we’d need to do from the time we arrived until the day we drove away. See what I mean about being an adrenaline junkie?

So… why is THIS event on the list of my 30 favourite things from my fiftieth year? Well… the people were exceedingly important to me — thus, their wedding had to be perfect. Because I love that family, I was so honoured to serve them. They had specific dreams and wishes and it was important to me to do whatever possible to make sure those dreams and wishes materialized. All the way down to that IceCream cake. The groom is nuts about Dairy Queen cakes — so, to duplicate them was my highest priority – in both taste and appearance– but, actually, I had to do it better. You know. A girl has her principles. And, on principle, I had to do better than a ‘fast food‘ place. ;o)

Now, lest you think *I* did all this — I assure you *I* did not. My whole family was in on the action. Jobs for everyone — great and small. I did see to it that the youngers had lots of time to run and play while we worked and the setting couldn’t have been more perfect.

I will never forget that event… and space & time does not allow for more details. I’ll let the menu and photos finish the story.

Chicken Picatta – Ribs – Garlic Mashed Potatoes – Cut Corn – Caesar Salad – Spinach Salad with Strawberries, Feta and Candied Walnuts Fresh Fruit Skewers – Rolls & Butter; Coffee – Tea – Sweet Tea – Punch… for 400. Additionally, we had a large table prepared for young children — corndogs, veggies & dip, chips and fruit and cookies. And… the six large Ice Cream Cakes — each were Chocolate and Vanilla layer cake with Oreo/Chocolate fudge filling and whipped cream frosting and chopped KitKats/Snickers/Nestle’s Crunch Candy topping.

At the last moment before the ceremony… a tremendous downpour necessitated making a major-major change in venue and we had to set up all the service indoors… for the food service, we had to utilize steam tables (that we had only been using as a holding place) and abandon the beautiful outdoor displays and serving tables. We also assisted in making a major last minute change of decorations and seating while all the guests attended the ceremony. And you know — it was the hand of God in that we were able to transform (what was to be an outdoor reception) the lodge into a beautiful reception hall as if it were planned that way. Astonishingly, Everything was ready when the guests returned from the site of the wedding ceremony. Whew! It was *incredible!!* And thanks be to the Lord God. Thanks to my family and great thanks to my precious husband…. he’s more than everything to me.

bb buffet wedding meal

777weddingfruitskewers ice cream cake
In haste, we didn’t get too many photos… and these aren’t all that great!! But it’s sort of a taste. For the eyes.

serving cake
It was a crazy – busy – fun – long – three days… but…

wedding clean up

it was a wonderful – wonderful time. And a total adrenaline rush!! ;o)