Potpourri – Page 21 – The Welcome Home

About that lingering conversation?

Well… about that lingering conversation, I thought I’d add a few lines.

I know there will come a time when I stop writing about our current “lingering conversation.” I know we’ll likely move on to other things. But I write about them — and whatever else I write about — for lots of different reasons. Mostly, I just don’t want to forget – and I know I will forget some of the small details of these days. Blogging’s sort of therapeutic for me. I don’t want to forget what God’s taught me, how He’s worked in these days, what’s going on and what I think of it all these days. I blog so that I will have a place to recall… I blog so that maybe someone else will be encouraged with things that have encouraged me. There’s a risk involved in sharing the personal details of life and I know that. There’s probably as much a risk of being understood as being misunderstood. There’s a risk to being transparent, but this is who I am… and this where I share slices of my life, and maybe something I write might help someone else too. So… I blog.

Wes had an appointment with the cardiologist today. It’s been a few weeks since we saw her and so we went through a time of sort of dialogging questions and answers. She gave Wes strong assurances that he could go back to normal work and any activities… even training for a marathon. We glanced at one another and smiled.

True story: On the way to the doc’s office, Wes said he wanted to ask what he would be free to do, what are his limitations, etc. and then said, ” It’s not like I am going to train for a marathon or anything like that… I just want to be able to do whatever the day requires.” ~smile~

So she answered Wes’s questions and gave strong rationale for the prescribing of each of the meds he is taking. And even humoured him when he questioned the validity of some of the rationales for the meds. But he agreed to take them – and to continue taking them. What was interesting to me was her favourable comments regarding some of the things he had begun taking (fish oil, green food, red yeast rice) and in particular: red yeast rice. She said there were many studies showing very favourable results from taking red yeast rice. And she went on to share some benefits. (Our sincere thanks to Kelli for her studying up on heart stuff – and more – for us!)

I had suggested to Wes that he not eat b’fast just in case they wanted to do some tests. When he was told they’d need some lab work, they asked if he had eaten yet today. O, so glad he hadn’t! He hasn’t gotten the lab results from the ekg or blood work but it seems quite certain that had there been a problem he’d have heard about it.

So we left the office… with sort of glad sense of relief… sort of with a sense of new resolve: now we go on. We needed this – or we needed what we’ve learned from this. And it’s one of those bittersweets… you know, one of those things you come to terms with and as the doctor said this morning, it’s a time of mourning the loss of “where you thought you were and what you thought you had.”

I’ve gotten to the place where I am thankful… and I can see I needed these lessons. I very much needed them. It was as if I was given a gift that day in the hospital as I waited for him in surgery. I remember sitting in a waiting room in that same hospital ten years ago when Wes cut up his hand in a skilsaw and underwent several hours of reconstructive surgery… I remember the lessons learned at that time and how God demonstrated His merciful lovingkindness and abundant provision for me/us.

Well… so now I needed to learn new lessons… not lessons so much about God’s faithful provision and physical restoration and His protection of my husband as I needed to meet his mortality. Now I may well still go before he does, but I needed to come to grips with the fact there will be an end. And I needed to affirm that I know that I know that I know God is sovereign. I knew it… I’ve known it… but I needed to know it in this matter of love and life and my love’s life. I needed to come to grips with the fact that God’s way in the life and eventual death of my husband is perfect.

I will praise thee, O LORD,
with my whole heart;
I will shew forth all thy marvellous works.
psalm 9.1

The Monstrous Regiment of Women

I’m looking forward to watching this film… for many years, my heart’s desire has been to encourage women to be women as God designed, not feminist, but feminine; so that, in the end, the Word of God is not blasphemed. The film? The Monstrous Regiment of Women. See a clip here.

I think it’s both discouraging and shameful to watch the decline of femininity and the assault of things feminine and modest and the demoralization/degrading of women — especially by the very ones who purport to be championing women’s rights. I say degrading because when a woman is lead to believe her work and worth are actually contrary to her God-given design and purpose — well, that’s degrading. The more this occurs, the less ‘rights’ women really have and the less honour and nobility as well.

Probably the saddest of all, the most egregious of all is the foolishness bound up in the heart or way of the mainstream church today – as this foolishness flourishes, the lack of understanding, lack of knowledge of the Scriptures, lack of respect for God – or a low view of God, and lack of wisdom is taking the mainstream church today down a slippery slope of both defiance to and of the redefining of God’s clear Word.

Psalm 11.3 “If the foundations be destroyed, what can the righteous do?

Liberate: To set free or release from bondage. [and I’m amazed at the dictionary definitions that also include things like: freedom from oppression, to give equal rights to or freedom for women and minorities.]

Though semantics plays a great role here, let’s understand that truly, a genuinely liberated woman is one who knows the LORD and knows and obeys the Word of God — Liberated from the bonds or bondage of sin and death. Then think of the cultural bondage women are subjected to. Think of the bondage of fighting against God’s design… living outside His order. That’s bondage… and yet, it’s the lie that women are being told every day (that they can be liberated and free by being “equal” with/to men) – it’s the lie of “women’s liberation” and truly, misery loves company and needs it, too (to propagate the lie). The lie is that being a feminine woman, a keeper at home, a wife, homemaker/mother, teacher of children, etc., etc., is bondage – something from which to be liberated.

Really, a truly liberated woman is free in Jesus… free to be the woman God designed her to be. So called women’s liberation is not liberation at all… it’s bondage to fighting against creation and purpose, and it’s fighting against God’s precious gift of womanhood – a life that is not in competition with men, but a life that is in completion of them. A truly liberated woman doesn’t fight to be in the man’s place – no! a truly liberated woman fights to be good, to be chaste, to be discreet, to keep her home, to love her husband, to love her children… all of these: that the Word of God be not blasphemed.

O, for a thousand tongues to sing…

Palindromes

I think palindromes are cool and have lots of fun looking for creative palindromes – but especially fun are long ones that also make sense! The easiest way to teach children to spot palindromes is to start with words they know… Pop, Mom, Dad, Tat… the, eventually they’ll get things like madam, level, and radar. Then on to a couple of words like: race car, stack cats… and on to: ” Too bad I hid a boot” or, senile felines. Always encourage children Try New Things – you’ll remember that: TNT!

You can go on to teach palingrams… sentences that read the same backwards or forwards: He was, was he? And then you can distinguish even further a word palingram and palindrome, too: “I did, did I?” See?

Then there are names… Tat, Lil, Elle, Bob…

Speaking of Bob… and I think his name probably got him interested in palindromes a very young age. Kids with names like that do think it’s pretty cool!

Take a look: bob-dylan-palindrome.htm
You’ll like watching this one… especially if you’re a Dylan fan – and if you’re not, you just might become one. His music and style is very unique and unmistakable. He sort of gives everyone the confidence that no matter how they sound, rhyme or strum, they, too, can be musical! 😉 (let it load and turn up your speakers – especially if you’re a Dylan fan)

Palindrome
pa·lin·dro·mist, noun
pal·in·drom·ic,
pal·in·drom·i·cal, adjective
pal·in·drom·i·cal·ly

* A line that reads the same backward and forward,” c.1629, from Gk. palindromos “a recurrence,” lit. “a running back,” from palin “again, back” (from PIE base *kwel- “move round,” with notion of revolving, cycle) + dromos “a running.”
* A segment of double-stranded DNA in which the nucleotide sequence of one strand reads in reverse order to that of the complementary strand.

Palindromes are fun for children to both see and experiment creating. It’s a great creative writing exercise and great for printing, too.

Palindromic Phrases:

Did I do, O God, did I as I said I’d do? Good, I did!
A car, a man, a maraca.
Sir, I demand, I am a maid named Iris.
Was it a rat I saw?
We’ll let Dad tell Lew.
A dog, a pan, a pagoda.
So may Obadiah, even in Nineveh, aid a boy, Amos.
Madam, in Eden I’m Adam.
Madam, not one man is selfless; I name not one, Madam.
So many dynamos!
A rod, not a bar, a baton, Dora.
Stop, Syrian, I see bees in airy spots.
A Toyota!
Egad an adage!
Marge let a moody baby doom a telegram.
Won’t lovers revolt now?
Yawn a more Roman way.
Yo! Banana boy!
Never odd or even
A man, a plan, a canal. Panama.
A six is a six is a six is a six is a
No, it is open on one position.
No, it is opposed; Art sees Trade’s opposition.
No, it is opposition.

My favourite palindrome? Hannah.

And the of course: Did Hannah say as Hannah did?
?did hannaH say as hannaH diD

Home is where the sweet happens

So… a late Saturday morning ramble… over a particularly delicious cup of coffee that I didn’t make (thank you, Kathryn, Mmmm mmm mmm). Being away from home this week has made me increasingly more appreciative of the things that make home: home. I was keenly aware this past week that there are wonderful things that are and that happen at home that aren’t and don’t happen anywhere else. The familiar makes home: home. Memories and children – children and memories… these are what make home: home. History makes home: home. The Lord makes home: home. The familiar, the security… the acceptance, the freedom to say and do and think things – these also make home: home. Or, rather, the freedom to say and do and think things without fear or with confidence of acceptance… well, these are what make home: home. Confidence of acceptance… what a wonderful thing… home is.

So… it’s so good to be home. O, and, don’t get me wrong… it was good to have a little time away, too. But the very cool thing was that the ‘gettaway’ wasn’t to get: away. It was to run to, and not from, something… it was to go to, and not away, from something. But, even still, though it was a tremendous time… a wonderful place to be and a delightful way to spend days and was very profitable and refreshing… it still wasn’t: home.

Home is where the good things are… home is where the good times are… home is where the sweet happens.

Sadly, I know this isn’t always true in every home. And, for many women, home is really the last place they want to be. So, through the week I have been mulling over… what makes home: home? and what can women do (or what can men do) to make home *the* place to be – *the* place to *want* to be?

This thought, or these thoughts actually, was on my mind all week as we spent time away on a semi-working holiday. We were learning a new webpage design program and were putting together the contents of the site. It’s slow going for me… bcz I can never seem to make a decision and stick with it… and the learning curve is steep for me. But my husband is patient and kind and flexible and loving and on and on. Along with our long, long talks about life and the season ahead, we talked about what we want to accomplish. I don’t know that we needed to get “away” to do this and I don’t know if it took a heart attack to do this or just what… but I do know that the Lord is surely directing the path… and we’re just seeking to order our steps aright.

What a delight to be welcomed home last night… by our children and grandchildren. Home is… sweet home. Home is where sweet happens.

holidays

Several weeks back, we made some plans for a little ‘working holiday’ away from home. Now… this has providentially been a real blessing – not just bcz we love to spend time here, but also has been a ‘forced rest’ for Wes. We’d originally thought we’d come here a bit later in the year or after the first of the year… but taking into consideration both Kathryn’s and Timothy’s departures (at different times) to Africa, we thought we’d do this now. Well… in truth, I actually thought it might not be a very good idea and even voiced my sort of nervous concern to the cardiologist… and she promptly said: Go! Whatever you need to do to get rest, eliminate stress and not go back to work… that’s a good thing to do (again, candidly here, I was not relieved). Wes was relieved. Though he’s a swimming pool contractor, he really does not like swimming. At all. Isn’t that funny? But… give him a spa and a sauna or steam room opportunity and he’ll like that!

And so, here we are. It’s a wonderful place to spend some time… such a radically different place and pace than home. And bcz we’re not too fond of crowded places or swimming with others, we like that the pools during the week are practically empty, very calm and quiet. In a very peculiar way, I’m even liking the misty weather (even though that’s one of the drawbacks to vacationing in the “off-season”) and the cooler days.
I’ve since come to see that Wes sure did have excellent foresight to make these plans to be here while the Sand Sculptures are still ‘on display.’ Harrison Hot Springs was the site for an international sandcastle building competition that took place in May and the sculptures were available for viewing throughout the summertime Harrison Festival of the Arts… and fortunately, for us, even now! We’ve walked around the lake and then today we looked at each of the sculptures… amazingly, these many months later, the sculptures have withstood many hard rainstorms and high winds and still are quite impressive to see! Some of the sculptures have sustained a bit of damage, and some even have some moss growing on them! but, for the most part, they appear to have just recently been completed. I’ve no idea the tremendous time and skilled work that goes into the creation of these sculptures on the beach… they’re just such amazing things!

The leaves have turned and the air is crisp and we’ve had to bundle up as we’ve gone out for walks! I’m thinking that for the next several months, this will be our daily routine – just not here – we are going home – really! Now, isn’t this an interesting turn of events! Here I am the one who needs to lose weight, exercise and drop cholesterol – and it was my husband who had the heart attack! His blood pressure has been good for years and cholesterol level’s been good, too. He’d made many changes in diet in the last several months and eliminated the daily donut nearly two years ago. So… here we are today. He continues to make different changes and has regained strength and stamina and says he feels pretty good. I continue to… drink coffee.

Tomorrow’s another day… I’ll be home tomorrow. O, home… home sweet home – holidays are sweet… but home’s sweeter!

Cholesterol Awareness…

Did you know that September is “Cholesterol Awareness Month”? O, yeah, I’m aware!

The service mark for the American Heart Association is: Learn and Live. I mull this over. I’m mulling over a lot of things lately. You know I realized tonight that I never thought my husband could/would/might die. Really… ever. I’m fairly sure I’ve been thinking it would be me to go first – still probably will be, by the way, though I’ve known there was a very strong possibility that my husband would have a heart attack or stroke or both. In fact, if he followed family health patterns, a heart attack was absolutely, positively guaranteed to happen. It happened.

Since heart disease is common on both sides of both of our families, it was actually quite foolish for me to continue cooking and serving in the manner I have for the last nearly 30 years. I’m troubled tonight by the fact that I have been pretty cavalier about health and food preparation and serving. O, I’ve been working at many healthful choices… but that really doesn’t mean much when there are an equal number of very unhealthy choices made, prepared and presented every day. I’ll write more on this another time.

There’s nothing like a brush with something to force action. It doesn’t matter what it is, when you have a brush with something, you act – or react. You get stopped by an officer for speeding — and if you only get a warning, in the future you watch your driving around officers. If you get a ticket, you watch your driving around speed traps. If you get a substantial fine, you not only watch for officers and speed traps, you watch your own actions… prevention. Same with cooking without instructions or putting together “some assembly required” objects… ruin things a few times and you begin to realize there must be some value in following instructions and that instructions do serve a vital purpose.

So, learn and live.

This isn’t going to be a new nauseating mantra, but we do need to make some more changes. The last thing I (or my husband) want to do is to become an annoying clanging cymbal… you know the clanging symbol or the noise of the newly reformed. Well, and especially since we’ve got so far to go and have a pretty pitiful reputation of making some rather unhealthy food choices. I mean, I’m pretty sure a Starbucks grande mocha isn’t on the ‘heart healthy’ menu. Or peanut M&M’s, either.

If you’ve got risk factors, you’ve got a few choices. Actually, you’ve got few choices. Do nothing; wait and see what happens — but actually you’ll likely make one of two choices. The first is to be faithful, live well, eat well, exercise well, sleep well, work at reducing stress and inflammation and then see what happens in your healthy so-far-as-it-depends-on-you life — or, live poorly, don’t eat well, don’t exercise, don’t sleep well, don’t seek to reduce stress and inflammation and watch the mounting unintended consequences of an unhealthy life take you in directions you would never have imagined.

Yesterday as I sat in the waiting room –that first meeting of the new club I’d just joined, I listened to a surgeon tell me to help my husband. He then went on to tell me my husband needed to do three things:

diet, exercise and eliminate stress.”

I was sort of glad I had left my coffee cup in the room where I’d been waiting previously. I’d ordered it from the coffee stand in the hospital lobby. “Whipped cream on that?” “No, thank you… my husband just had a heart attack.” I was thinking… I need to turn over a new leaf. Well, actually I need to dig up a whole big tree.

blogging’s like a bicycle

Well, sometimes blogging’s like a bicycle. You ride and ride and ride some weeks and then other weeks you just can’t seem to get to the peddling. Still other times, blogging’s sort of like a bicycle with a loose chain… you get going and things seem to be running along pretty smoothly and then the chain slips off the gear. That’s a bit descriptive of my blogging style, I suppose.

Yesterday… o, yesterday… what a day! I’ll write more about it tomorrow — it was a bittersweet day. It was the day of our friend’s memorial service… but yesterday was also my husband’s birthday. He can now order senior coffee at McDonald’s. He has an AARP membership. He has my unfailing love, admiration and respect. And I think it’s pretty neat to have shared 32 of his birthdays with him… how God has blessed me with this tremendous and loyal husband and all these wonderful years!! I pray for many, many more years.

Today would’ve been my daddy’s birthday… I wish I had known him or spent time with him all of my life. When I met him as an adult after not spending my childhood in his care, I never would have imagined the swift passage of time and never would have thought he’d die so young. Every one of the “senior years” is younger to me… now. We had some wonderful years and our children — his grandchildren — treasure the memories and rehearse them from time to time. He was larger than life… and some of the memories have, because of a bit of embellishment, taken on a life of their own, I’m afraid. But he really was a grand man with grand stories and witty humour. On this day, eight years ago, I was sitting beside him… he was dying of cancer… and the making of memories had come to an end.

And today’s the first day of autumn. hmmmmmm.

more tomorrow. the chain slipped off.

09-11-01

Do you recall where you were and what you were doing on September 11, 2001?

On 9-11, what’s inherently understood as September, 11, 2001, our country was hit with the worst terrorist attack in history. I think most of us can remember things or events of that day as if they occurred this day. I was sleeping and my mother called on the phone to alert us that a plane had crashed into one of the buildings of the World Trade Center and that if we could, we should get to our television. She knew that we have no reception here at our home without some serious juryrigging wires, coat hangers and tin-foil. But she knew we’d want to witness what was going on in New York. And we did. What happened in the following hours was nothing short of horrific.

At the time, my husband was caring for a friend who had a severe brain disorder and was spending every day at Harbourview Hospital in Seattle… our baby, ‘melia, was 10 weeks old and we also had a brand new grandson. Our older children had just begun a new homeschooling year and the weather was warm. I recall that, for days, we simply left the tv set on, distorted sound, fuzzy picture and all.

What an amazing time that was… what a strange turn of events. What an amazing source of conspiracy theories that event was and has become. And as sensational as the reports sound, there are some that really sound plausible – especially as each day brought conflicting stories. Theories or no, conspiracies or no, truth or lies… what happened on September 11, 2001 was, again, nothing short of horrific. What a devastating tragedy and unspeakably dreadful event… for those who died, for those who helplessly attempted to save them, and for those they left behind —the loss and grief they continue to bear must be overwhelming at times. And for the rest of us, it will always be remembered as a very sad day in history.

The Way I See It

Or, actually, the way I figure it is that I’ve bought enough Starbuck$ mochas to be invited to submit quotes for their cups. I know, I know… it is rather presumptuous of me to think I’ve got a running shot at the competition. But, I mean, really… have you read some of the quotes? Now, actually, there have been some rare occasions I’ve gotten a cup with a quote worth framing. Seriously. However, most of the time, I don’t find the quote worth the cup it’s printed on… and surely not a filled cup. Okay, okay… enough of that rant. Sometimes I laugh out loud when the caption on the front of the cup catches my eye. I have to laugh… it says: Careful, the beverage you’re about to enjoy is extremely hot. I think: Hmmm; I hadn’t noticed! Must be the paper band around the cup.

So… my husband came home from meeting with the men in our fellowship. Yep… $bx is one of the best little places in town to talk and study the Word. It’s comfortable and warm… and, amazingly, not too busy at night. Now, Sunday morning, on the other hand: total mayhem! Really. My husband came in and I just had to give him a hug and take in the delicious aroma of café latté! And… he had just enough plain coffee remaining in his cup for me to heat it a bit and feel like I enjoyed a whole cup! I also wanted to read:

The Way I See It #238

Have you noticed that dogs are the new kids?
You take a walk with your kid and your dog, but
nobody says, What a cute kid!” nstead they say,
“What a cute dog! What’s his name? Is he a rescue?”
Maybe if I put a collar and leash on my kid
someone will notice her.”
– Judy Gruen
Humorist and author of The Women’s Daily Irony Supplement

I thought… Why, yes I have. I have noticed that for a long time. Dogs (or pets) are the new kids. All over, women are being duped into believing that that nurturing, loving, homemaking desire they have deep down inside can actually be fulfilled by a pet. Women are being sold a lie… and they’re buying it, too: that a pet can be just like a baby. You’ve probably seen it too. A young couple gets married and they’re not ready for a family (so they ought not be married – ooops, I digress), but they have this longing… so they get a pet. They have a baby shaped longing in their hearts… but then they fill it: with a dog. They take the pet everywhere. They call the pet their baby and each other: mommy and daddy. They buy special things for it and then they have a portrait made and send it to you for Christmas and you have to hang that picture of that little “family” on your fridge. Yep – have to. Just think of how hurt they’d be if they came over to your house and saw that you didn’t respect their “family” enough to post their portrait.

We’ve had many pictures on our fridge over the years. They’re great conversation starters, too. But you know… they can also be prayer reminders, too. I pray for them… pray the LORD will bless them and fill the longing of their heart. Honestly, I genuinely believe that women have been sold a bill of goods and have been educated to believe contrary to God’s wonderful design, conditioned to ignore the longing they have to nurture and taught to accept the counterfeit. For years I’ve received prayer requests from women who put off childbearing and then ache month after month, year after year: praying and waiting for conception that they had previously fought.

So, yeah… I have noticed that dogs are the new kids. The way I see it? Believers need to live otherwise.

A life profound

True story.

I was shopping today at the restaurant supply store. A checker (who is older than me, by the way) I’ve seen many times over the years asked me if I always wear my hair this way.

(you know… undyed, twisted up in a bun)

I smiled and said, “Yes, I do.”
He said, “It looks so nice. You remind me of my grandmother.”
I smiled. I think I looked down. (wincing and smiling)
He said, “No, no, no. That’s the highest compliment I could give you. Really.”
I tucked my debit card into my wallet… picked up my keys and cellphone.
I thanked him…

Still smiling as I pulled the flatbed cart to the door, then waved and said good bye.

Hmmmmm. A life profound.