So, another chapter’s underway.

We just returned from Portland. The trashcan full of empty Starbucks cups, orange peels, granola bar wrappers and baggies of bits of remaining mashed sandwiches tells part of the story. It seems as though a week has passed since 5:00 am. The long drive home is just one of many distractions for which I’ve been thankful so far this year. It’s as if each distraction has been a special gift from the Lord – each has been a necessary thing, a necessary interruption or a necessary trial or testing of faith. I’ve wondered if I hadn’t had, or if we hadn’t had, all these distractions or interruptions, would I/we have been able to handle the emotions of these days? I know (without doubt, really) that God would have carried us without the distractions, He would have comforted and directed regardless the interruptions, but I also see how He allowed these things to lessen the impact or to actually obscure some of what might have been seen, heard or felt in the days leading to our son’s departure.

I’ve often said that anywhere in the world is safer, better, healthier in the Hand of the LORD than out of it. This isn’t an attempt at positive thinking or persuasion, I do truly trust that there is no place I’d rather be and no place I’d rather have our children be than in the hand or in the will of the LORD and surely, there is not a more fearful, dreaded place than outside the will of the LORD. Faith and trust doesn’t mean the absence of heartache or sorrow.

So, this morning when I hugged Timothy ‘goodbye-for-now’ I was keenly, albeit painfully, aware that God’s blessing was on him, that he was in the Hand and will of the LORD and that God would, at once, protect, guide and provide for him. It never fails that the hustle and bustle and schedules of airports are a subtle distraction to the impact of the moment and the overwhelming, raw emotions. So today, even in the midst of all of that, I kept determining that I’d be aware of each of the children and Wes’s heart for his boy — you know, remembering: “it’s not all about me” and I’m not the only one left behind.

Somehow, other trips were easier (and thankfully, there have been many through the years) and it was somehow easier knowing Timothy would be home again. But this time, unlike former trips and adventures, the separation is more permanent. Other times were short-term mission’s trips, school and work related. This isn’t just another trip, but the beginning of the rest of his life. Now, that may sound dramatic — especially since I/we sincerely believe that everyone, or every believer, rather, is called by the LORD in some manner, to preach the gospel whether in word or in deed. Timothy, like other ‘career missionaries,’ will not have an additional vocation but will be working full time in service to the Lord.

Now, it’s even later in the day and reality is beginning to set in. I’m missing Timothy so much this evening I feel like I cannot breath. His absence, as is true in his presence, is strongly felt. His clothes in the dryer was just one example of strong reminders that he was just here and equally so that he is not. He told all the boys they could have all his clothes and shoes and other things he left out. His bedding was in the washer – I suppose in an attempt to make things easier for me. I smile that no chore for him would be hard to do tonight… somehow doing the laundry is giving me the feeling that I’m still doing something for him. Even though no one will be sleeping there tonight when the freshly washed sheets are put back on his bed.

Maybe tomorrow I’ll have enough done on the webpage where I will begin a journal chronicling his life as a missionary in Tarkwa, Ghana, West Africa. I did this sort of journal for Kathryn when she went to Uganda last year and will add to it when she returns next month.

When Timothy lands in Accra tomorrow, he will travel north, about 120 miles, to Tarkwa where he will live. Initially, it will be both culturally and geographically challenging to him – but he is eager to be there, eager to learn and eager to expereince all that God has for him. His goal and plans are to assist the missionaries he’s traveling with, and to preach the gospel and make disciples — that’s the Lord’s command in Matthew 28 and, in addition, that’s where the missionary’s experience will be so valuable and encouraging. They’ve registered and are establishing a missionary school with the goal of cross cultural training and more importantly that the school will support itself and be operated completely by Africans. This is not a temporary ‘humanitarian aid’ program, but a life changing, training and equipping for ministry and self-sufficient or self sustaining school learning how best to use natural African resources. The resources are rich and abundant, the people are open to the gospel.

After a time of settling in, establishing the school, etc., with local believers working in the mission school, from there he will go with the experienced missionary further north seeking to reach unevangelized tribes and people groups. This is where the cross cultural training will prove to be invaluable: local believers reaching other tribes.

We pray for his work there… we pray for God’s blessing, provision and protection and we pray for good health and strength for them all. Most of all, we pray the Lord will receive great glory and that many will come to know and serve Him through whatever way the Lord uses Timothy.

To God alone be the glory.

Great things He has done.

more later…. —-pamela

A new journey.

teacuppamela.pngToday’s been one of those ‘not-so-clear-thinking’ sort of days. One of those, put the milk in the cabinet and the cups in the fridge sort of days. But I keep thinking: God is not the author of confusion but of peace and also that He has not given us a spirit of fear but of power and of love and of a sound mind. These are part of the whatsoever’s I’ve been thinking on (after I give into fretful confusion and recognize the need to clear thinking!). So, in an attempt to take every thought captive, I’m needing to continually resort to the whatsoever things are true, honest, just pure, lovely… think on these things.

We’re preparing for Timothy’s soon departure to Ghana, West Africa, where he will begin life as a missionary. Suddenly, today, I’m feeling overwhelmed, underestimating what needs to be done and in the midst of a flood of emotion I’m attempting to gather the needful things, address the necessary and set aside the unimportant – things for today.

While I knew this was coming, and really, I could say that everything and nothing has prepared me for this day, truly I see that it’s the hand of the Lord and His ways that matter – not what I think of these days and not even what I can pack or prepare to send that matters. I guess I know that no matter what we pack and send, there are so many unknowns and, in reality, not much space to pack the ‘known’ or the needed items.

If it were up to Timothy, I think the bag might contain a few articles of clothing, several books, his Bible, some commentaries and some pens – some pictures and important papers. And soccer balls. Minimal toiletries. And a hand pump. I think, so far, that’s all he’s packing. He’s found, wherever he goes, soccer balls speak a universal language – somehow, the simple activity of kicking around a ball, breaks language & social barriers and opens doors of communication unlike anything else. Well, maybe food, too. So… soccer balls travel well.

I’m waiting for an opportunity to add my two cents or at least a few things that make sense to me — you know, and at least a few things that will say to him: I love you. I’m also thinking of survival type things… double checking things like meds, first-aid, flashlights, two-way radios, herbs for ailments, nutrition bars, tissues and purell. Maybe, by the time he boards the plane, most or all of those things will already be or will have found their way into his bags.

Later…

I hugged him goodnight… mindful that he’ll not be here for good night hugs and humorous recounting of the days’ activities… after tonight’s sleep, he will likely fondly remember the cozy night’s sleep… the queen size bed, the memory-foam mattress and the down comforter that snuggles nice and warm with the window open just a tad for some cool fresh air. He smiled as he, too, realized it would be a long, long time before such a night’s sleep happens again.

I’ll write more about this later. For now, it’s off to dreamland… and that lingering place between awake and sleep when reality slips away and memories and dreams fade into yesterday.  And a new journey begins — actually, a bittersweet journey that began 20 years ago, and this is just the next page…
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In the inbox this morning…

teacuppamela.pngEvery now and then I receive an email that strikes a chord with me… perhaps punctuates a thought or confirms another study. Well, that’s how this one was for me this morning. As with all the other distractions to what’s going on in our family this week, I see this distraction as a welcome one – for it actually confirms the “why” behind what we believe what we believe and why we do what we do. When we take stands for the Word or when we take stands against the trends in the church today, it’s not that we are seeking only to preserve and promote an ‘old way’ but we seeking to shine a light on the atrocities of the ‘new ways’ of the church. Mostly, as one often encouraged and inspired by Spurgeon and as one who takes a stand against the false gospel of the so called post-modern ‘church,’ I share the following mail.

So, here’s from my inbox this morning:

quotebegin.gifGodThoughts Wired!

There is a ‘Different Gospel’ in Town: Part 2
Brad Reiches

Monday, January 7, 2008

GodThoughtsWired!

 

“There is a ‘Different Gospel’ in Town”
PART 2

Consider the following statement made by a man known as “The Prince of Preachers:”

 

“It is absolutely necessary to the preaching of the gospel of Christ
that men be warned as to what will happen if they continue in their sins…
You are too delicate to tell the man that he is ill! You hope to heal
the sick without their knowing it. You therefore flatter them;
and what happens? They laugh at you; they dance upon their
own graves. At last they die! Your delicacy is cruelty; your flatteries
are poisons; you are a murderer. Shall we keep men in a fool’s paradise?
Shall we lull them into soft slumbers from which they will awake in Hell?”
C.H. Spurgeon, bold mine

When the “gospel” is presented without a clear presentation of the law, sin, judgment, and hell, the requisite repentance necessary for true conversion is rarely present. The result then, are “false converts” who think they are saved, but are not (see Matthew 7:21-23).

One concerned GodThoughtsWired! subscriber questioned the validity of my concern. Perhaps clicking on the following advertisement might help:

Mars Hill Church Sponsors New Year’s Eve Booze ‘n Dance Club

I’m pretty confident that once the crowd gets “liquored up” for free, they’ll be pretty receptive to anything else the “preacher” has to offer. I can just picture it:

“Happy New Year everybody. Praise God!
Before our designated drivers escort you home,
I’d like to make sure that you’re going to Heaven.
How many of you want to go to Heaven when you die?

If so…just raise your hand right now…
I’ll say a little prayer for ya’…AND YOU’RE IN!

See you all at next year’s party. Please be sure and pick up a flyer
on your way out that tells you about our weekly gathering…
WATERIN’ HOLE WEDNESDAYS!”

When false prophets and false teachers give a false witness based on a false testimony and false signs & wonders; the result, more times than not…are false converts…

EVEN WHEN EVERYONE INVOLVED IS SINCERE!quoteend.gif

 

Later on I’ll share a bit of family happenings in our home this week as we prepare for Timothy’s departure to Africa where he will begin life as a missionary in Ghana, West Africa.  —-pamela

Another year over… have a nice day.

teacuppamela.pngOnly a few days into the new year and already it seems old. Actually, maybe not even a new year after all… just another month — another calendar — since the other one ran out of pages. I’m still thinking of Christmas. I’m thinking of all the chaos that surrounds Christmas – those who do and those who don’t: do Christmas. I’m thinking of all the expectations and the dreading other’s expectations. And I’m missing the songs. I’m missing the greetings in the local stores. After being able to say happy-Christmas for several weeks, “Have a nice day” just doesn’t seem to be ‘enough.’ But then, nothing is — ever enough, is it. Well, except for Christmas. I guess there gets to be a point where it seems like we all say: enough’s enough. That’s when we know we’ve really gotten our priorities out of balance — we’ve lost sight of what’s really important — what really matters.

Even still, I’m missing that special thing that Christmas always brings. And if I’m not very, very careful, I miss it at the time. I’ve had to guard against that my whole adult life – and probably much of my childhood, too (though I wasn’t ‘responsible’ for whatever Christmas meant and I guess my mama went through all of that at the time). There’s a very heavy aura about Christmas… the expectations, the hopes, the deep seated joys, longings, regrets and memories. Christmas music only seems to amplify whatever the emotion happens to be at the moment.

Many times as I was doing the dishes in the last month, I would hear: “I’ll be home for Christmas… you can count on me… please have snow and mistletoe, and presents on the tree. I’ll be home for Christmas… if only in my dreams.” And I would begin to dream. I’d dream about Christmas -past, Christmas that never was, Christmas as I had always hoped and Christmas that would never be. Several times, the same towel used to dry the dishes was used to dry the tears that seemed to well up at the most surprising times. And I’d sing along… And so happy Christmas…

When I accepted the Lord as my Saviour I had a real conflict of interest and many things had to be rectified. I had my little ‘t’ theologians and the Truth of the Word.  My little ‘t’ theologians were people I’d sing with all the time. You know, The Doobie Brothers — the little ‘t’ theologians who taught me to sing: Jesus is just alright with me (O, yeah!).   My little ‘t’ theologian, Cat Stevens who taught me mystical stuff that was hard to shake — because it sounded all so right.  And probably the deepest rooted, little ‘s’ spirituality and relativism came from the Beatles (and I was truly a diehard fan — much to my regret today). The more I read the Bible the less I would listen to all of that — the less I could listen to all that.

And the longer I walked with the LORD the more I saw that the enemy was subtly luring me with lies in all of that music — is it ever powerful: music. Jesus was more than just alright with me – He became my everything. So much music had to. go!!  And it did go in a big way one day.  I could no longer ‘imagine there’s no heaven’ – it was no longer easy (or desirable) for me to try —for I came to know there is a hell and above us not only sky.  And then there’re all the dumb songs I guess I’m really glad to bid adieu (even if I do get that sentimental feeling when I hear: deck the halls with boughs of holly, tis the season to be jolly).

So it’s another year over.

But some of the songs of Christmas still ring in my ears. I can hear the singing — the old songs, as I think of the old year, the new year. And Christmas.

quotebegin.gifAnd so this is Christmas
And what have you done
Another year over
And a new one just begun
Ans so this is Christmas
I hope you have fun
The near and the dear one
The old and the young

A very merry Christmas
And a happy New Year
Let’s hope it’s a good one…”

It’s a new year.

Have a nice day.
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The dawn of another year…

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I didn’t really make any new year’s resolutions this year. I don’t ever really do well with resolutions – I set lofty ideals and then fail. But you know, there really is something about a new year, a fresh start, a clean slate that has a particular appeal to me. I want things to go well – I want things to be fresh and new and without all the problems or blemishes of the past or without the obvious failures or even partial successes of the past. So, I guess I must, deep down, have a desire to set and keep new year’s resolutions — even though I say (or feel like) I don’t.

So, I’ve been mulling over many things in the last several days. You know, the good things and hard things of the last year – the “all that happened in 2007” things. I’ve been mulling over some of my life “resolves” — things I resolve to do, be or say. Sort of the planks I stand on in life. What are they, for sure? I’ve been asking. I’ve also been praying… I’ve asked the Lord, what would You tell me or what would you show me if my whole heart was fully yielded to You? What could You do with or through me if I were totally yielded to You? I listen for the voice of the Lord — but I suppose many times I discount the voice or I think I don’t hear completely or whatever. O, how I want to be resolved that I will seek the Lord – I want to hear the voice that Elijah heard (1Kings 19), when the Lord was not in the wind or the earthquake or the fire – but was there… a still small voice. And I know God is faithful – He is and has been faithful. I think of those things I feared but that did not come to pass. Those things that I feared that did come to pass —but— the Lord was with me — He was before me. He is before me and behind me. His grace is sufficient for the day and His provision is steadfast and abundant: beyond what I could ask or imagine.

On this first day of 2008, I’ve had the privilege of seeing some of the most spectacular sights on earth. From the rising of the sun to the darkness of night, I’ve been keenly aware of the presence of the Lord. Early this morning, I stood on a hilltop looking out over the vast prairie of Idaho; it was still and quiet except for the sound of snow crunching under foot and a few birds that would occasionally swoop down. The view was absolutely breathtaking; it seemed I could see for a thousand miles — and I was filled with astonishment at the beauty of the Lord and of His creation.

Later, as we traveled west, over hills and valleys, through strong winds, over great rivers and hundreds of miles wheat fields blanketed with fresh snow which was illuminated by the sun and it seemed to glisten like millions of millions of diamonds. We were again mesmerized by God’s handiwork — His provision — His creation. Many hours later, as we traveled down our lane, we could see the little twinkle lights in the windows seeming to say: welcome home… and now in the warm house we’re mindful of His answers to prayer, His merciful kindness, His protection and provision and all we can say is: thank You.

I Stand In Awe Of You
Mark Altrogge

You are beautiful beyond description
Too marvelous for words
Too wonderful of comprehension
Like nothing ever seen or heard
Who can grasp you infinite wisdom
Who can fathom the depth of your love
You are beautiful beyond description
Majesty enthroned above

And I stand, I stand in awe of you
I stand, I stand in awe of you
Holy God to whom all praise is due
I stand in awe of you.

It is the dawn of a new year, and I am filled with both awe and hope – for what He has done and what He will do. And I do stand in awe of the LORD… I’ve had time to think of what God’s done in the past year – again, those things I feared that did, and those things I feared that didn’t, come to pass in the last year. O, the countless miracles and tender mercies of the Lord. It’s because of these things and more that I resolve to obey the LORD and I do stand in awe.

So, the first plank I want to stand on this year is the plank of faith.
The second plank I want to stand on this year is the plank of wisdom.
The third plank I want to stand on this year is the plank of truth.
Still another plank is the plank of discretion.

At the dawn of this new year… may I — may we — be found faithful. I pray God will complete the work He’s begun.

 

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